All Rants

I’m just lonely and sad. In love with someone that wants to take care of me but doesn’t want a relationship. I want to move on but letting go is too hard

I’ve been feeling lost and like I wasted my professional career. I left the corporate world last April to work remotely after moving to the province because I bought my first house. Commuting to the city was no longer practical, and I had wanted WFH since the pandemic. Logically, it made sense, but five months in, I regret leaving my career path. I spent years climbing the corporate ladder in hospitality and eventually became a manager. Now I’m in a remote role outside the industry I built my career in. The pay is good, but I feel like I lost my professional identity. I also constantly compare myself to my younger brother whenever he gets another job offer, and it makes me feel unaccomplished. I’ve been applying for remote roles related to my experience, tailoring my resume, but most applications get no response. Some interviews went well, only to end in rejection or silence. I know leaving my toxic workplace was right, but I still feel like I traded my career identity for stability

I feel weird, I've been 18 for 4 months now but nothing feels like it's changed? I still like relatively "kiddy" interests (MLP, Gacha Life, Cookie Run, Sonic etc) and it makes me feel bad? Like on Roblox someone insinuated I'm a creep for being 18 and being on Roblox.. It's stupid but it made me feel awful.

I’m not addicted to porn idk what to say I’m treading dangerous waters here

Feeling lost and I feel like I wasted my professional career everytime a tend to compare my current position with others like my younger brother So long story short I left the corporate world last April to transfer to any remote work regardless of the position as long as its a good pay. Mainly transferring from another city to a province area which logically and economically commute is not an option because the fare will be 5x more expensive. Reason why I moved from the city to a province is because I bought a house.My first ever house.

Update on: post 3812 I still feel like this, it's gotten better but I still feel it on bad days I don't experience attraction I think or struggle with it which has made me fear I am what I said in the post, I think I had a porn addiction growing up.. because I was exposed to NSFW at 11-12 and sort of fell down that rabbit hole. It's better now I'm not trying to "fix" my asexuality at least haha...

I fucking hate myself. I'm in this birthday susprise thing and im the only animator. The only problem is, I'm the only animator. It's my fault. I'm just a fucking failure who doesn't care about anyone. I want to kill myself.

i dont get i dont get it i dont get it

i dont ljkd anyone anymore and nothing brings me joy ever again. i hate everything that has become of me. everyday i spend looking thru glass anf being so off center i dont get it its like im gone

that was so wrong. augh i hate myself

And the preceding posts are exactly why little kids shouldn't be allowed Internet access and given a phone.

I just wanna rest man my mother is fucking forcing me to wrote 16 big answers for my half yearly and there are only 10 days left for my exams and my work was in complete as I went to xaviers bhopal for a competition and won 1st prize in ad fusion man I just wanna rest

I can’t share my entire friend group with my partner. It sucks. Like if I want to rant about how frustrating they can be sometimes, I can’t because they’ll just hear about it. I can’t help but think they specifically chose to get close to my best friend so that I couldn’t talk to them. I mean, my friend is great but tends to overshare sometimes and my partner is really good at getting information out of people. My partner asked me about something I’d specifically told my friend and thought was private but apparently he knew about it. I feel betrayed by both of them. It’s worse when my partner specifically tries to back me into a corner - my best friend lent me a guitar so I could learn to play without having to buy one, but when my partner came back from his work trip, he was being all weird and asking how much I paid for the guitar and how come he didn’t see it get delivered… but my friend had dropped it off to our house while my partner was literally inside before the trip so…

So it's been about 3 months since we vbropke up, but I dont rlly think I have moved on where i accep that we are mot together anymore, but insrtead I feel like i just moved on where i just learned how to live without her. it sucks. i keep seeing hert everyday too. damn.

It was one time the dick pick was one time the snap account I added was sending me nudes and asking for me to send too and I was horny I’d send my gf nudes if she wanted them

So, exams are tomorrow. I still have not studied. Not because I don't want to, but becausde i seriously cant. I hate it.

I hate it when i get closer to a friend who i think i can be myself around but they say or do something that makes me think otherwise and all of sudden every time i talk to them i feel uncomfortable or like i have to mask because if i don't it'll be weird

I have nothing to live for now but I need to make it to the 26th of November. The concerts over. I know that no one actually cares. All of my friends are sick of me, I know it. They will never like me back. And now school is starting and I have nothing friends, I look like a fucking freak, and no one will ever live me for who I am. I’m a fucking waste of space, a stupid rag doll that’s only played with when someone has nothing to do. I fucking hate myself so much. Maybe when all my flesh rots off of my bones and I become one with the soil and plants in the forest will I actually be beautiful. When my rot creates something people like. But I can’t do it just yet. I need to make it to their birthday, I need to give them one last hug goodbye. Please help me please help me please I can’t go back to therapy, they only made it worse, please help me please.

I went outside yesterday with a girl and 2 boy college friends. all night, I had to witness their little hints they're into her, subtle compliments and not so hidden remarks and I felt out of place. after the terrible night out I feel hideous and gigantic and I never wish to set foot outside. it doesn't help I drank while on antidepressants, I made a fool of myself and probably right now, this depressing feeling might just be a chemical effect. I started spiralling and overthinking my appearance, my weight and the reason no one has ever pursued me. the lessons I learned: I'm not drinking ever again and I'm won't be hanging out with dudes. I despise this feeling of being unwanted. I hate battling body dysmorphia and getting back to the old beliefs I tried so hard to leave behind. I'll keep trying to accommodate to the thought I'll die alone, maybe have just a few friends. Anyone up there that hears me, if I'm meant to be alone, please take away my desire to be loved.

I was in a relationship for 9 years with someone with MDD. Over time, it’s felt like more of a burden because I have to be the one to initiate activities, cook, chores, plan things, and half the time it never works out because they don’t want to or can’t get out of bed that day. They told me that they were contemplating self harm because they didn’t see their life improving. They asked me to stay with them for another year to see if a new medication helped them (it hasn’t and it’s been 9 months). Finally acknowledged that we needed to not be in a relationship anymore, but I still live with them until I can move into my new place in a month. It doesn’t feel like a breakup. I don’t feel like I can move on. I’m not sad, but I’m not happy either. I don’t know what their plan is for the future and I’m torn between wanting to know and not. They want to keep doing things together (travel, dates, sleeping together), but I feel like that’s just staying in a relationship? I’m confused.