All Rants

My mentally abusive girlfriend needs to stop writing me "I want you back" letters while trying to masquerade as me on this site. /smh/

I feel very tired. There's always something happening. I need a break. I just want some time to breathe and not worry about anything.

so guys i had a comp yesterday as yall know and i lowkey cooked: 2 allround 1 beam i didnt fall like i did my turn and then was like shocked 3 vault 5 floor 6 rings 2 team uh yea but lowkey still was pissed and tried strangling myself with my medals guess theres no pleasing me ig...-f.g

My gender dysphoria is eating me alive rn and it's making me depressed and angry and I can't fucking cope anymore istg

my grandma asked me to bring her her pills. after i put them back my hands were genuinely shaking because i was thinking of overdosing on them tonight. i love so much people and i care too. but the guilt is killing me. Im sorry god Im sorry J, but its eating me whole. I feel so bad because im lying to so many of my friends about my feelings & religion and i feel selfish not telling them

I miss the way she used to be before breaking up with me I can't help to grieve a version of her who cared about me and gave me love even when I was sad and didn't try to push me away. I can tell her mental health is decreasing and she won't tell me what's bothering her, it hurts so bad and I loved her so much. I don't know how to cope cause all that I can think of is how I can help her even knowing that she will never come back to me and that version of her is lost. She treats me terribly now and ignores my feelings and pushes me away when I ask what's wrong, I don't even know what to do anymore.

I am tired of thinking at this pointof trying to calm my mind down. I don't want to make villain out of him. I don't want to hate him. I just want to be able to take care of myself without depending on him. He has his own things. It's fine. I am okay. But all these thoughts won't let me sleep. I am half angry half don't care mood at him. I can't express what I feel. I feel weird. I can't tell anyone what's happening inside. All i see is that I am expecting way too much of myself and of others around me. I just have to endure things and see where life goes. I can't control things so why should I worry. But sleep..it never comes to me. Sometimes I don't even know what is keeping me up

religious guilt is eating me up and i wanna die.

i wish my mom gave me privacy i wish my mom allowed me to be who i wanted to be. i feel so alone and i dont trust anyone with anything. except for my best friend, shes going through the same thing but worse. i miss my ex.

My parents are fighting again.

I want her back. I want her to love me again. My health isn't going good and I wanna leave this life behind. I wish I never told her I like her. I wanna kms

so my grandma is an alcoholic. she has been since her second husband left her, so around 15 years. she doesn’t want any help - she’s too prideful for that. but she’s killing herself. it all started getting bad in april when she had a migraine so she didn’t drink for a few hours and caused herself to have a withdrawal seizure. once she recovered, the doctors told her she will die in the next 5 years if she doesn’t quit drinking. today she had another seizure but this was a lot more severe than last time. she’s sedated in the ICU with breathing tubes and more. im not sad or afraid im just so fucking angry, how could she? she doesn’t care about the impact her addiction has on us. we filled in a form and one of the questions was “the most important thing to me is…” and i said “myself” and my mum said “alcohol” but we left it blank. if she dies i have nothing good to say about her at her funeral bc she’s made life unbearable. she can’t take accountability and now it’s too late.

how to break up w/ sm1 no glue no borax bec they’re 3 yrs older than u, ur 14, and u dated them rlly out of pity and had an emotional attachment to them so it was hard to say no (pls help🫩)

I can't even walk into a fucking room without being told I'm not good enough. then you wonder why I leave a room every time you enter?! maybe it's YOU you piece of shit. I'm so sick of it. I can't ever be enough for you and I never will. then you act like me even being upset by the hurtful shit you say is unbelievable and that I'm "disrespectful" meanwhile I can't even look at you without you getting set off and belittling me and barreling towards me like a bull. I am so sick of you and I'll never be free of you. this is why I have scars on my body and a fresh scab. because of you

I hate that I get put in the worst situations. Fam does wrong neighbors report without talking to us first multiple times . Nobody will talk to anybody WHICH COULD HAVE RESOLVED EVERYTHING TO START WITH. So since they hardly ever leave the place I'm the one hated without cause by them and I didn't do a fucking thing. Fam is too passive and cowardly to do any kind of confrontation. So it's ALWAYS me that gets stuck with the bullshit WHICH IS SO NOT RIGHT. The shits above me think they can thump and stomp all the effing time anymore, day and night keeping me from sleeping well or at all. Fam continues to act like it's nothing. I haven't done anything wrong and those stupid karen bitches hate me for nothing. I'm fed up of the fucking thumping omg. Fam should have confronted them to start with they did wrong NOT ME. But those above us are in the wrong by being loud after hours, especially seemingly purposely being loud in the early morning WAKING ME UP. I'm about to turn into the joker.

My grandmother is a narcissist. For years i wanted her to love me, but she won’t. I saw a grandmother buying her granddaughter stuff at the mall, i would like it if my grandmother did that..but all i want is to Hear a real “I love you” from my grandmother 😕

Wow..you are the prettiest shade of blue!….unfortunately they like pink. (This isn’t about colors.) open your eyes to see that you are adding to much color to yourself..you aren’t going to be their favorite color. Stop trying….they won’t love blue like how they pink.

cw: csam mentioned back in october my now ex was arrested. leaving me in his apartment unable to drive, no money, 2 hours away from home. in march he finally got his sentencing which made me realize how much he must have lied to me to end up with 20 years after supposedly only looking at cp once reached out to one of his exes and found out she has the same name as his little sister who's not even in middle school yet. and that ex wanted to name their daughter the same thing as me. which just makes me feel disgusting, like he purposely found me, someone with that same name.

I HATE EVERYONE SO BADLY I HOPE THEY ALL DIE

its hard to talk abt my feelings cuz i dont think they matter. i have this idea in my head that no one will care about me or what i do or what i say. so when i think about talking abt my feelings, i stop because i dont want to put that burden on anyone and i dont always feel the same. one day im great, then next im depressed like whatt??? plus i dont trust ANYONE. i dont tell people anything besides the brief stuff. i dont even tell people who i like.