All Rants

I feel so depressed recently, I just hate my life so much. I've already written down how to su1c1d3 and who I should say goodbye to if such people would even care. I can even properly take care of myself well enough. My own mother doesn't even care, and ive been choking with my throat, and my father says its just normal Im loosing my friends all of them slowly departing I have thought of running away multiple times before but they wouldnt work because the police would just find me I just want to disappear forever apparently my mother guilt trips me when I try to go to my dads place on her week because I can be more alone then hes never home until 8 o clock at night so it would be a great time to be alone and for people to forget about me i cant do this anymore..

I actually can't do this shit anymore I need to kill myself. And I almost did 4 times already but apparently I'm too much of a pussy

Im sorry. I just want to be okay. Im sorry i reported him. I just want my family back. i just want to be normal.

Im behind in school. The sophmore slump is kicking my ass. My rapist came over today. My moms still with him. My grandmother hates me. I feel his hands every moment of everyday. I'm so lonley im venting to strangers on the internet. fuck my life.

i CANNOT stand hearing someone chew or smack or slurp or breath. absolutely no reason for anyone to be that loud while do any of those things. none. i shouldnt be across the room and be able to hear any of that. i could just rip someones head right off their shoulders. i remember chewing loud when i was a kid just to piss my mom off but goddamn if i was her i would have smacked the ever lovin shit out of me. fuck all that. i got family now thatll chew on their own lips and i will dead ass look them in the eye and be like fucking stop it if youre hungry i have food. a girl at work eats nuts during lunch like every damn day and i can here every nut being broken into every little fucking piece from across the damn room. ridiculous. just so ridiculous. just want to smack the damn things off the table into the wall.

Been dealing with my spouses depression for years. I love them but i’m running out of compassion for it. I’m exhausted. I always have to put my feelings in the background. They don’t do anything to get better but then complain bb about having no help. They make steps but it isn’t instant and they stop. I feel like an unpaid therapist who can’t clock out. I can’t even tell them or set boundary about it because then they’ll clam up and say they have no one to talk to or who understands them. But I’m exhausted and running to the point where I just don’t even care any more. It’s like I have to deal with the radio station playing their depression and I have to sit in the misery with her. I want to just scream to shut up but then that would ruin our trust

I have to leave my career for health reasons. I do as manual labor job but it’s destroying my body. I don’t have a degree and I feel hopeless trying to get any sort of job that doesn’t make it worse. I want to get a job in my dream career but it’s very competitive and I don’t feel good enough for it

im bipolar. im medicated or trying to be bc i snap easy at the ones i love and others around me. i tried lithium and it really did help but it made me so tired. but this crap im on now doesnt seem to be helping like at all. i dont want to be on anything really, i was just smoking mary j to help with things but no longer do that bc of personal reasons. it is what it is i guess but its not fucking great. i just want to be happy and "normal" without having to take some kind of medication to be that way. why cant my body produce the things it needs to normally?

I can only parrot back what I hear and experience but it seems to me that under populist feudalism, all the teachers first responders volunteers and general altruists want you to know what a slow, nightmarish road to invasive humiliation punishment and ostracism they are trapped/roped into.

i'm scared she's gonna leave me or she's losing interest because i feel like she's avoiding me. i feel like she doesn't want to talk to me. i feel like i was too much. i feel like i annoyed her. i feel like i overwhelmed her. i feel like she's already lost interest. i'm currently feeling awful and sad and i don't know what do to

I am an absolute nuisance to everyone around me. If I dissappeared, nobody would care, why would they? I am annoying and forgetable. If I jumped out the window to my death, people will only come it my funeral to be polite, as they sit with the payed mourners they'll talk about how maybe its good I'm gone. Then they'll forget about me, like a childhood goldfish destined to get replaced. I am truly dispensible. I hate it.

I constantly feel like a hassle, Everything I do annoys someone. I don't mean to be annoying, I don't want to be annoying but I am literally just an awful and annoying person. I hate it, I hate myself. I wanted to write this out to maybe have someone say "ohh no its ok i bet your lovely" but I've seen this exact same mindset on the most toxic people ever. Am I just toxic?? Because if I am, I don't mean to be. I'm sorry if anyone is reading this, I'm sorry.

I feel like im autistic and that might the reason I am the way I am. I am sometimes an airhead and very sensitive to point where the smallest things could bring me to tears. And I always get shit for crying over things and I try to tell people that I'm doing the best I can to control it, but they still ask when it happens again. I say a lot of stupid shit and I have to deal with genuine assholes and bullies every so often and I just want to crash out at them, but I know it wont help. I would tell an adult but that wouldn't do anything either. I just want people to treat me like a normal person and not the 'weird one' or anything like that. I dont want to be highly sensitive and i dont understand why im even like that. I cant even take part in a friendly debate because I'll get so heated that I'll start tearing up.

how the hell can one person sleep all night till 4:30p the next fucking day? lord knows i wish i could but god forbid i even sleep in a extra hour or two when i can. immediately bitched at when i first wake up this morning but its okay for you to sleep all day just for you to get up and smoke fucking weed and do nothing for the rest of the night? and i get it the weed helps with whatever. im not asking you to stop (it makes you fucking easier to deal with, youre a better person when youre high)ypure a dick when youre sober

I hate that this person is stuck in my head till now, even after 4 years of knowing him i can’t forget him. I’m so done being stuck on a person that does not deserve it.

I don't wanna go to school anymore, my heart aches, I can't do this anymore, I'm so scared, and my step dad hates me, I can't do my routines in this state anymore. I can't search for help because it makes me look stupid

I felt lost— yet I kept finding myself.

my father ruined my dreams, it's okay, but I'll never forget how he ruined it.

missing someone doesn't mean that you need that someone back in your life, its just, you miss them.

falling out of love, the hobbies used to like, feel some kind of empty. Crying secretly everyday, academics feels like pressured. smile has been gone, don't have any friends to open up. Mental health got worse, feels like I have nothing to do with my life.