All Rants

I have no friends. No lover nothing. My family hate me. I hate them too but I cant help but everytime loneliness hits me, I wish my parents could hug me and reassure me. I just tired of feeling lonely. Im hitting rock bottom, I barely sleep, I cant eat without throwing up, Im here like a loser rotting in my bed like a corpse and waiting for classes to come again. I feel like im dying

I feel like I have no one. I moved to a state 10 hours away from anyone ik, both of my sisters stayed behind. I thought my friends would still contact me or call me and be there for me but I feel like they’ve forgotten me already. My sisters don’t answer me either. At my new school I don’t have fun things to look forward too, I’m constantly worrying abt making ppl like me and keeping ppl next to me as long as possible. I’m really quiet so I struggle to find people to talk to. My brothers are always on technology so I can’t hang out with them at home and my parents are always working. At this point I’m js wishing for anyone to lean on.

my life is a living hell. my best friend dropped me SOLEY because i was giving opinions she doesnt like, my girlfriend just tried to kill herself, i cant get out of my self harm and weed addictions, i only have two real friends left, im about to be frcefully enlisted into the navy, and i dont know what to do.

To the person who replied to my last one about my body, thank you so much.

NEED TO FIX THE "NEXT" BUTTON. It doesnt go to older posts, just takes you to the top recent ones..

my friend leah basically saved my life last year when school and life and my parents was super shit but now shes going to college 8 hours away and i miss her already and she’s barely left. and i am so so scared that i cant do it without her. what if she leaves and i cant do it on my own. what if she leaves and goes and lives her life and forgets about me. what if i cant make it without her and im not enough. what if im not enough.

I need some advice. I been struggling to get a job (like most people in this awful job market) and my family is pressuring me into going back to this program to become certified in a field that I dont like at all. I dropped the program for a reason and I dont want to go back at all. I just need some advice on this I suppose.

I hate everything bro Genuinely why do I feel this way, why am I even THIS way? I miss yet resent people so much, and when I mean I hate everything I mean it I can like things and hate it so much at the same time I hate school I hate my friends I hate my teachers I hate myself I hate how I look I hate how everyone looks I hate how stupid everyone is I hate how smart somebody else is I hate how advanced I am I hate how there’s so much responsibility But hate is just a word and it’s a word that will always be in my vocabulary, and that’s there all it is to it; a word. An EMPTY useless word that I hate. And I don’t mean despise, I don’t despise anything—I hate. Hate is a strong word but despise is stronger, so why is it that I can only seem to garner enough anger to hate and not despise? To be the middle line with a deep resentment to everything and to living and dying? I am always overreacting, again

i don’t know i just want to talk to someone, i don’t really have anyone

I'm trying real hard. I've been in a constant state of lethargy for a week and a day. I'm trying to snap out of it. what botheres me the most was how lonely I felt. nobody would bat an eye at my misery. nobody would message me a "hey". I hate being the only one making an effort, I feel like a pushover. for a change, I'm listening to cheerful music, I've returned to my love for crosswords and I went outside. only thing worrying me: becoming parasocial for a boygroup I recently started listening to. it's easier than it seems to go down this road, especially when you feel lonely. I'm terrified this lethargy will turn into anger. why is this happening to me now of all times? I was doing better. I'm terrified I'll cause unpleasant situations for everyone close to me. I resent people for abandoning me and taking it out on them would be the worst solution I could come up with.

Oh my gosh I’m so annoyed. My tics have been acting up all week, I feel like my friend is excluding me and hates me, I can’t act normal to save my life, I yelled at fourth graders, I can’t learn how to give up control, I’m a fucking bitch in general. I don’t hate life, but I hate spiraling and feeling upset, even though it’s a privilege to even have things to be upset about. FUCCKXKKKKKKKK

I hate living inside my body. I'm disgusting. My body constantly twitches and I always have a headache. And my face don't get me started. Or my stomach or hips or thighs just pure fat its disgusting. Oh don't forget my periods. I'm disgusting I can barely take care of myself even when I'm on my period, its gross, my mother told me herself. Looking at a mirror or food makes me want to puke. I just need to get out of this body.

I like feminine guys, but not "femboys." I kinda don't understand this myself but they just look a little too soft to me maybe? people also keep making weird jokes about them too so that's annoying to see with them. I honestly don't know what to say, I'm just really attracted to rui from xlov..... I've never seen a guy like him before. he wears long hair wigs and makeup, he has muscles but he usually looks obviously feminine. but I don't want a masculine guy with long hair. I cant find other guys that look like this but as I said, I don't really understand what I mean lmao

For some reason I kinda forget dudes exist

Im addicted to cutting myself and school makes it so much more I cannot stand feeling dumb, my biggest fear is being incompetent I cannot handle feeling like this

my mom is constantly yelling at me and saying I do nothing. I've been feeling so depressed since I was 12, my doctor said I may have unmedicated adhd, I see no point in doing anything because I already know my life wont get any better, I have no hobbies or talents, nothing ever brings me joy, I'm so bored of everything and I've told my mom before and I even said that I was thinking about hurting myself but she just wont care. because shes always yelling at me, I feel like it is true, I'm a useless kid who does nothing. there's nothing good about me, nothing I can do, I'm just an empty mess

nobody ever talks about or thinks about people who are apothisexual. everything is about sex, everyone likes sex. I think its so disgusting despite it being a natural thing. I want to slam my head against the wall whenever I see sex related things. porn, songs, music videos, drawings, sexual jokes, anything. its all people like. I know that "sex sells" is true but you aren't making it better... shout out to everyone who is sex repulsed

I wish I was skinny but I do nothing to change my body. I'm obese for my age and height, it makes me feel terrible about myself. I get overwhelmed so easily when I try on clothes in stores because whatever I like, it never fits. everything is always for skinny people. everyone only loves skinny people. "skinny shaming" is stupid because everyone wants to be skinny already and its the only body I see anyone want and praise. even though I feel like this, I don't do anything to lose weight. I don't diet, I don't exercise, I just do nothing. but its like there's no point anyway. I barely get motivated by anything and it never lasts long. I always fail and go back to my regular habits. I could never even lose the amount of weight I want to lose, that would take ages. I have no hope for myself at all. whenever I thought I found someone I could relate to with eating problems and body image, they are always skinny. every fucking time.

my boyfriend and i were supposed to hang out today after not seeing him for like 2 weeks but he made a last minute decision to go to a party to network with ppl 400 miles away and i hate that its so hard to have my own hobbies and that i feel hurt that he makes this grand effort to see and interact with other people but not with me. he offered to see me for a bit when he came back home today but i genuinely just feel like hes going to be annoyed the whole time and want to go home to work and i just feel like i have bpd at this point? like i feel like i dont exist outside of my relationship or like if i do snything to make myself feel better its just like people telling me why dont u do something productive and its like i just feel so small and tiny defending myself and saying to otheres that me playing a game or me sewing and doing my hobbies is something productive but it just feels so dumb. i feel like i cant do anything without disappointing someone else or even myself

I keep having thoughts of just killing myself in different ways and I really want to but I dont really know why. I get bullied alot by many different people and some of my family members aswell about my weight I hurt myself for no reason I just feel like it and I have been doing it for 2 or 3 years now and I either cut or scratch myself until I bleed, when I scratch myself it's usually because im out and overwhelmed or there's too many people but when I cut i dont really have a reason I usually am just bored and I like the pain , I have scabs from yesterday because I was scratching myself till I bled so I relapsed I was like 8 days clean I have a few scars on my upper left arm, boty wrists, left ankle, my arms, my right thigh and my left hand from cutting and scratching, I dont really know what else to say but have a good day or night xx