It hurts. Over and over again I get attached to emotionally unavailable people. They all acted like they were so obsessed with me at first. The first one was cheating the whole time we were together, I wasn't even his first choice. The second one rejected me and disappeared when I asked him if he ever wanted a serious relationship with me. The third one faded from my life and replaced me with someone else. The most recent one is in an abusive relationship and can't get out, doesn't seem all that willing to get out, even though he says he loves me. And all the ones inbetween. They all acted like they loved me so much. But it never lasts. I'm just a shiny toy to people, and I lose my shine after a while, and that's when they drop me. I'm their object. I'm a doll. I'm so tired. I just want something that works. I want to feel like I'm lovable and the first choice and the only choice. I don't want to worry about being replaced. Please don't leave me. Please don't ever leave me again.