All Rants

I have been told my relationship is toxic. I don’t see it. Yes, there’s two red flags, but it’s not like they’re big. The second one, and probably the worse one, is that every tiny fight is somehow, someway my fault. For example, we play a video game together, and I messed up and got us both killed. We were at a high level, which we’ve been struggling to get to, and I was just happy to have done that well as a newer player. But he was upset with me. And yes, I understand how it’s my fault that we died, but he just started saying how I always mess up and shit, and it REALLY hurt. But other than all of this, he’s a total green flag! He does bare minimum things, and he’s an artist and draws things for me, and he recently watched my favorite musical for me, without me asking and then he proceeded to give me a little voodoo doll witch keychain(like those ragdoll ones from Texas and such?) and he gave me a custom note about how my body is perfect, no matter what someone else says.

I was a good kid before. All sweet, all innocent and cheerful, so bright. So disciplined in my routine, fearless.. not caring about the world, not caring what the others think about me... I used to be good at art too. Now what? It's all in the distant past. I've become the person I hate. Gosh... I lost all my spark. I wish I could go back.

my sister was diagnosed with typo, diabetes and I feel like I can’t sleep now because if I sleep something bad may happen to her. My anxiety is high. I have a headache always and I feel horrible. My anxiety has never been worse and I don’t eat unless she does. I don’t understand diabetes a lot so it’s a lot to handle. I’m hoping she’ll get through this and learn she’s very breathe and I hate it when she cries because of the needles I might have it too, which I’m very scared about because I don’t like needles and I’m not good with pain, but I should be fine hopefully

If fire departments treated calls for help like the police treat missing person calls, they'd tell the callers that they don't go to fires because often they'll burn out. If it's still burning in 48 hours, call us back.

where do I even start... I'm a girl and I have a girlfriend... we love each other so much but God.. she going through so much, shes the only thing keeping me alive, and I dont know what to do I've asked for help but still haven't gotten it, and God I want to marry her but life keeps trying to tear us apart and I'm not letting it happen.. I'd take my life for her, I love her but I don't necessarily know how to help her, but I just need to talk to her and get help, may not seem like much but I don't know how to explain it other then Im tired of life and shes the only thing keeping me alive besides my cat

I can't grasp the concept of death, I have panic attacks thinking about it

I've recently started university. I'm not a bad student, but... I feel like I'm not very good at group work. It's not so much a matter of being "intelligent," I just find it really hard to talk to others. I don't know if it's me who's wrong, if I'm not interesting enough to keep people around me, or... why do the people around me always seem to prefer someone else over me? They might treat me nicely, laugh with me, and seem to be having a good time, but in the end, there will always be someone who entertains them more. Even though I say I like being alone, part of me longs to have someone that important, to be someone important to others. But I guess I'm too afraid to take the risk and find that someone.

When I was in elementary school, second grade: my school was all girls, the most popular sport was volleyball. Didn't have any problems with PE until that incident. The teach formed teams to do races; one of these was to throw the ball over the net with a volleyball motion. I took a long time to throw the ball, causing my team to lose. My classmates yelled at me. The teacher, instead of arguing, corrected me harshly and dismissively. A dance teacher who happened to be passing by joined in and did the same thing: humiliating me. Although I didn't see that teacher again in elementary, I did see her again in high school (all-girls school too). Luckily, I didn't get that teacher... unfortunately, my "little" phobia never went away. This new teacher divided us into teams to play volleyball. It was after the pandemic, and I didn't know anyone. I ended up crying, trembling, and unable to move. Teacher told me I could sit down. idk... Hate how allat affected mylife...

I don’t do anything wrong but yet after anything I do, I feel gut wrenching guilty and I hate it I have done nothing wrong

I don’t understand myself, I could do something normal like eat something or even do a normal task, but after I feel so gut wrenching guilty and it makes me wish I was dead bc it’s the worst pain I’ve ever felt. I don’t know why I feel like this but I can’t do anything about it

the rumores are not true-jews have stop targeting me-they raped me when iwas little boy violently lots times Conejo #leavemealone #firstblood #fuckoff

I don't know why I'm choosing to live anymore. Nothing makes me happy. No one makes me feel safe. I'm tired all the time... — I'm trying I'm like actually truly trying, reaching out means trying, getting up again means trying, eating a meal means trying... But trying isn't enough right now. I'm tired.

I really can't do this anymore.. it's been eating at me for 3 months . My birthdays in a day. It's only made everything worse. — I reached out like I'm supposed to... But I didn't receive a hand back.

fresh undergrad. endless applications, but not even so much as a call or email back. but i guess i'm the idiot, since i chose an arts major. being raised by people age 60+ didn't help either. what is linkedin or ATS to them? back then, a handshake actually meant something. i genuinely thought i'd be able to land a full-time career straight out of college. no, really, i did—that, precisely, is how incredibly fucking naive i was. and still am. but there's no such thing as entry-level anymore. maybe there never was. oh, i can freelance, sure—but take one long look at upwork or any other such oversaturated website, and you'll see why that'll never work out, either. hell, i doubt even the *volunteering* applications i sent in will be answered. it's not like any of it meets a human's eyes anyway. how exactly did THREE of my co-workers manage to break into tech writing without even aiming to? i'm deeply concerned for my now *and* my future. raise a glass to feast or famine.

please have him understand where im coming from-why i dont trust Justin + Janet for good reason + have him believe me + have him keep secret those things i want keep secret even though there no scandal in the information-i just dont want my class to be sabotaged by Justin + Janet targeting does not make me hate Jews less they never got punished for what they did to me i dont want revenge if the targeting of me STOPS 100% FULL STOP NO TRICKS aLRight man? fuck

wish Jason 100% believe me + have faith i n me again + give me another chance cus im telling the truth

For 1. Sorry not sorry I can't stand my neighbors. They're hypocrites which I also can't stand. Irks the heck out of me because the obnoxious crappy vibes they give off. And the fact they mass reported us trying to get us evicted for smoking WHEN THEY THEMSELVES VAPE, AND WITHOUT LEAVING A NOTE ON OUR DOOR WHICH COULD HAVE RESOLVED THE WHOLE DAMN THING. AND blew confetti bombs on our walk but none got on theirs, and pushed snow against our vehicle. Despite family saying it wasn't on purpose it seemed a little "too coincidental". The noise is supposed to also stop at 9pm. Their offspring since they pulled them out of school fog whatever reason has ran jumped thumped etc and at times have been noisy up to 4 in the morning, then the Karen (not actual name) gets up and makes it sound like it's raining steel balls jumping me out of bed sometimes most days of the week. What a bitch. I hope they get neighbors above them like themselves one day. Not really done but almost out of space.

I just want to scream loudly into an endless void. Scream about the hate, scream about the emotion, just scream about everything I’ve been keeping inside for so long. I want to scream so loud my ears bleed. I want to let everything out now. I want to yell and for it all to leave me. I want to scream with every ounce of energy I have left. And I want to be heard. Heard so other people like me can understand that they aren’t alone in this. Heard so that people who feel like giving up can be heard too. I just want to be loud and reckless for a few minutes. Just so I can feel again.

my friend got arrested during school and i just found out hes being accused for accesory to murder and firearm offence for the murder of a 20 year old man

I'm fucking tired of people harassing me and bullying me because in trans and I'm fucking sick of it, I've reported them at least 7 times but the school has don't absolutely NOTHING and its gotten so bad that they're telling me to kill myself and honesty I know I shouldn't give them the satisfaction but everyday it gets worse then I have to go pretend I'm okay to my emotionally abusive mother and its just getting worse so I'm planning to kill myself tonight with some pills, a rope, and a knife. I don't give a fuck anymore about my life, I have one person who actually acknowledges me but I rarely see them anymore and I think they're ignoring me so I actually don't give a fuck anymore, Goodbye everyone