All Rants

Continuation of Rant #17221 but like I GENUINELY don't care anymore. I've already been planning for this since the start of the month. My story will end here. I have been abused by my father, pressured by my mother, treated like shit by my extended family, and I've been forced into a prestigious school which I didn't want to go to in the first place. I feel like a machine made JUST for their success, I feel like I was conceived JUST for money, not out for the actual love of it. It's genuinely gotten so TIRING to go to school day after day after day and I don't even have someone to talk to. I WANT to get out of here. It feels like the only way out of this hellhole is to genuinely just die. I've only been pressurized by this because I got "Most Outstanding" in Daycare. THATS 7 YEARS AGO LET IT GO I DONT HAVE THE SAME SKILLS AND COMPREHENSION. The coping advices ain't even working either. My family treats my so negligibly.... The my people I like in my family are my cousins iibh.

...ack...other is happy ack....ACK!!!!

i haven't fucking slept cos my mom decided that she needs to make loads of noise and keep putting shit that isn't even mine in my fucking wardrobe for like an hour she won't fucking go away. why are you putting other people's stuff in my room?? i'm not your fucking storage GO AWAY I DON'T WANT YOU IN HERE 💔 i've literally been trying to sleep this entire time and she doesn't even fucking care i'm so sick of this fucking house. literally just let me sleep i swear she does stuff just to bother me cos there is absolutely no reason for her to be doing this

i can't go back to school. i don't see myself surviving another year. i attempted last year, and was in a really dark place, and i'm scared it's going to come back. i know it's going to come back. i don't know what to do anymore.

I miss my dead bsf so fucking much. I’m at our old hang out spot next to the high way, I keep thinking I can just end it right now I can just get rid of this pain. I need to get rid of this pain. I already fell back into cutting myself I can’t do this shit anymore I miss him to much.

i overstepped. i was trying to help. ive never experienced losing someone before, and i was just trying to help him open up so he had someone to talk to. but he shut it down also immediately, and now he's upset again. i want to help, but i dont know how- seeing him lost in dark thoughts is almost as bad as losing him what can i do?

What's a moment from today where you felt completely overwhelmed by something simple? Not been up for 2 hours and I feel like screaming right now. I hate when my sleep is ruined because shitty people don't give a fuck how loud they are to you. Everybody received the same letter about noise cut off time at night. This fuckin bunch above us don't give a fuck. They're obnoxious ass ghetto fuckin pigs. If talking would resolve it that would've been done already but no they had to come against us first and report report report to try to get us evicted instead of simply at the least leaving a letter on our door. They're a bunch of fucking cunts. Karen is really too good of a name for them more like fuckin jezebel. They need locked in a zoo if they're going to thump all fuckin night. I'm sorry but I'm not, I don't deserve to be put through this because I bother absolutely nobody. They're neighbors from hell.

I wish the best for you and everyone else.

and what doesn't kill you comes crashing to you at 8am in the morning. it may not kill you or seemingly affect you at all. but that's a decoy because it will come like a fork twisted into your gut at the most pleasant time of the day to wreck you

I used to be so kind. What happened to me?

Please stop it PLEASE do you even know what goes through my head im tired and it hurts just please stop

I'm slowly detaching from life. I'm a person who wants to make every single day productive and meaningful. However, everything feels annoying and such a bother now. I'm losing interest to things I used to love. I've become so lazy, depressed or maybe I'm just dramatic, unkept, exhausted. Falling asleep is getting harder, eating properly and on time is now becoming a bother, cleaning feels like a drag. What's hard to see was realizing that I'm starting to not care about the things I love such as drawing, cooking, socializing and studying. Isolation suddenly became my sanctuary. I don't know anymore

I’m so glad there’s so many beautiful people And I’m so glad there’s so many kind people Blame me for keeping my ignorance, blame me for choosing to see the beauty But thank you all for being so darn amazing -LD

i wish i wasn't alone. i wish more of the people in my life were capable of helping me the way i need. i wish i felt like i had anything to offer, so that i could exchange it for what i need. i wish i wasn't disabled. i wish i was more.

i wish it was easier to put the effort in. i wish it didn't feel like pulling teeth just to get myself to do the things i need to do for myself even just to feel better. i wish i wasn't who i am. i wish it was easier.

i wish i hadn't been born someone whose chance at really living was meant to come so much later in my life. im tired of waiting. hurting. fighting. im tired of surviving.

Sorry I had to do this publicly i can’t send messages for some reason :P but! My Dude, my fellow, my dudette, you are actually an awesome sauce person, and don’t worry it’s not a breach of privacy >.< Thank you for knowing I exist!! Put a little soul out there for the world -LD

how many ppl are actually on this website... almost no one puts their initials or a nickname so like.. i only know i think 6 including me... how many??-f.g u obvi dont have to tho like its anonymous

Is it a lot to ask for quietness to sleep at night? These people thump at different times through the night so I don't even know how much I slept. Im so mad right now for real I could probably hurt somebody. This has been going on for months so you get sick of it and people I tell about it act like it's nothing. Obnoxious ass motherfuckers. I hate feeling like this because it's not who I am. Who the fuck thumps all fucking night anyway!???????!!? It's bullshit. Sigh.

hey LD, thx. also im so so sorry if this a breach of privacy like genuinely so sorry but i js wanna say, i needed that. also imma 'add u to my list of ppl' nah not literally but like ik u exist as person❤️-f.g