All Rants

I don't know what to do in my life I have 3 brothers one sister

ALSO I can't ask questions without being on the verge of having a nervous breakdown. I AVOID communicating things because I don't want to be snapped at by grown ass TEENAGE ASS adults. Fucking CUCK ASS IDIOTS. I have been in a major funk the past month. I always am from August to September. Especially this year. It's been years since my mom died, and I have such a latent grieving response. It was extremely hard around that time, my nervous system has not forgotten. All I think about each day is how I'm going to kill myself. But I won't, I have people I don't want to hurt, so I endure. But when I go into work, and I'm already in a shit mood, then I have some short dicked loser and a genuine fossil bitching at me I boil over and breakdown in the bathroom. I bet they think it's all them and I bet they genuinely get all giddy about it. It feels like breaking down at that is giving them satisfaction and I don't WANT to do that. But I can't help it. GOD I NEED A NEW JOB PLEASE. BURN IT.

I've never truly recovered from anything no matter how hard I fucking try. I'm such a disappointment.

“I actually work. Unlike SOME people.” This quote from a coworker who barely moves her mouse, grants herself two twenty minute breaks an hour (in addition to the two ten minute breaks and one half hour lunch we are already given by state law), and is coming back from a nine month maternity leave (yes, I’m well aware that the US has shorter maternity leaves than most countries). I am the one who does all the emails, answers all the calls, does everything that comes in via the fax machine. She answers ONE call for me and tells me “It must be nice to just sit there and do nothing.” I don’t take days off. I work Monday - Friday. I don’t call out even when I’m sick. When I do take a day, (it’s rare, even my supervisor says it’s rare) she says “Wow, must be nice to be not have to do anything” 🙄 She is just full of herself. End rant.

Everytime I hear my mom I get annoyed for some reason but I have no idea why and she just said “I know you hate hearing me talk, I won’t anymore” and now I can’t stop crying and I feel really bad

This is going to feel very aggressive. Fucking HATE 2/3 of my managers. Genuinely wish they would CROAK. Get the absolute fuck out of here with your bumfuck shit. All they do is get pissed about their own lack of keeping consistent as a team themselves. One tells me something, I do it, other one gets pissed and decides to be a snarky WHORE. Then they go whisper to each other about it, and think its not obvious. Worst part is I know realistically they are like this because of how miserable they are with a personal lack of control in their lives. But fuck dude, DIE. Or at least lick my fat dick and balls. And I cant talk back or complain to the boss, because of how tight of a unit they are. They're basically all family friends? So it's absolutely no shit who they'd believe over me. I need to find a new job ASAP. It's been nothing but a blessing my boss has kept it closed for the past week. They want a good worker, but if they keep putting pressure on me they can have BARE MINIMUM.

I actually feel so useful. I don’t even know why I’m going on at this point anymore. I hardly have any friends and it feels like everyone at my school hates me. The only people that would ever understand me go to a whole different school and il never be able to transfer. I’m just trapped in this place where everyone thinks I’m weird. Sometimes It feels as if people having to sit next to me is inconveniencing them. I’m supposed to be smart but now my grades are slipping and I just want to give up. I don’t have the same passion for school anymore because I just can’t bring myself to care anymore and it’s depressing.

FUCK ARROWHEAD FUCK HELLDIVERS THIS FUCKING GAME IS EATING ME AWAY LIKE FUCKING PTSD I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT FUCK THIS PIECE OF SHIT GAME

I'm so scared that I'm pregnant. I'm a full week late to my period which has never happened, but the last time I had sex was on day six of my cycle so idek if I could be pregnant?? Me and my bf had sex yesterday as well, which I don't think was a good idea but I thought that maybe it would help jog along my period as that has helped before? I'm 16 turning 17 next week, I can't have a baby and I would be ruining my bfs life if I was, he's already been through so much and I can't add a baby into the mix. My parents are also religious so no way would I be able to get an abortion if I was and idk if I would want an abortion. I don't want to be pregnant. But I don't think that I would want to bring a baby into this world and not be able to see them or raise them or be in their life I'm so scared. I don't want to take a test in case my mum finds it, and if I'm not then is something wrong with me? (I've had a pregnancy scare before so I'm basically stressing and overthinking)

Every single day is a battle to not kill myself

Whats up people how does this bullshit work

it doesn’t get better. it never does and it’s just some lie people make up to give others false hope. people have it so much worse than me. im being dramatic.

I’m so close to just ending it all. My whole family hates me my friends don’t generally care about me. My mental heath is terrible but my mum just says it’s “lazy” “disgusting” “your just a teenager” “it’s just your autism” Eveyone thinks I’m tired of everything because of my autism but people forget I have emotions as well, I’m also human. Many people I know mentally abuse me. Not to forget one “friend” basically used me for their pleasure, convincing me best friends dress up as femboys and cat girls for each other, most people find it funny and cringe but they don’t realise it was forced and they also made me cosplay their fictional crushes (that made me uncomfortable). My dad is also homophobic and transpohbic. I have a comfort character but it’s naoya so everyone hates me even more. I can’t control what beings me comfort and what dosent

i have a friend and we have both wanted someone special to talk to for ages as in relationships and whatever we still talk about those stuff but she has someone who is a friend but they do couple stuff and do all the things we used to yearn over she still talks to me about wanting a boyfriend and it angers me because she already has something so close to it while i have nothing i know she is a really kind person and doesn’t mean to and i know i should be happy for her i hate when she talks about him but i also want to hear all about it as she is my bestfriend and i feel interested in a way im not sure if im being selfish i dont even know anymore and i have nobody to talk to it about because she is who i tell everything all she talks about is him because shes excited to have someone like that and she ignores me to talk to him too she means no harm and she is really understanding and i have talked to her about it as unseriously as i could but she still subconsciously talks about him

I asked someone out to go to a wedding with me and he said that hes gonna have plans that day and to ask someone else and that weddings when you know no one is rlly rlly awkward and he can't do it and I'm low-key rlly upset about it bc I was hoping that this kinda kickstarts a lil thing between us but idk ://

I really like a girl right now, i'm a girl too. My crush has a girlfriend but her girlfriend has said nasty things before and i KNOW they'll break up soon..i just don't know if my crush will ever like me back. I feel ugly and fat no matter how much makeup i wear or what i eat

oh my god why does my mom get to yell and hit me and call me out my name when she's upset about something unrelated to me but when I get even a little loud when im upset about something and shes on a power trip and wants to make it difficult, im the disrespectful child??? im the bad guy??? I'm so confused. sometimes I get so fucking tired of my mom wailing "WHY HAVEN'T YOU STOPPED HARMING YOURSELF YET?!!" but then you do some stupid shit like this. i can't do this much longer i need to get out of here or im going to slit my inner wrist and let the blood skeet out i cant i fucking cant.

dude i’m in this friend group that i’ve been in for years and this summer i’ve gotten really close with one of them, right??? me and this other girl are really similar in the way that we think and our differences compliment each other and we have good conversations and everything, but i wanna make it clear that the majority of the conversations me and her have are open to the others and in the group chat. another one of our friends acts as if we leave them out all the time, but shys away from talking about and listening to serious things that affect me and the other girl in our lives, doesn’t care to get to know either of us, and just expects us to praise them and give them what they want without being a good friend at all. it’s insulting and i really hate the way that they act because they also can’t join a conversation without it having to be a self-deprecating comment that makes the whole conversation awkward. does this make any sense idk…

Why does my mom love my dad more than me? It's technically correct, but why do I feel so unloved by all of her? It's not like she shouldn't love my dad as much as she does, but it feels like I'm just her annoying child.

Dear Tanisha. My girl. I still love you, I’m sorry. -maggs.