I am honestly quite done with everything now. Everybody's expectations of me and my own spiraling mental health are taking a toll on me. I genuinely cannot help it. I'm so tired always. I just want to sleep. I don't find myself interested in anything nowadays. Work, studies, people, even social media. I'm quite burnt out of everything. Yet despite all this, I'm still existing. Yes, existing. I feel like a passenger in my own body. As if my life's on autopilot and my brain is constantly shutting off. I'm becoming self-destructive to the point even, my friends are getting worried. Despite this, my parents continue to hound me 24/7. Sometimes I wish something would happen to me just so that they would NOTICE that their child isn't OKAY. I'M NOT OKAY. Atp IDK what I'm even yapping about. My mind is constantly going a million miles per minute and it is SO HARD TO STOP. SO HARD TO DO ANYTHING. I'll sign off by saying, NO, I am NOT suicidal. I'm just a human being tired of this society.
Recent Rants
TW: MH,SH,SI I have struggled with depression since i was 9 along with unalive thoughts and actions, i had asked my mom if i could possibly have depression, she said it was impossible so i moved on, during my parents divorce, i began SH and was taken to a therapist, this therapist diagnosed me with BPD. My mom said she was crazy and wouldnt tell me the diagnoses till i was 17. I went unmedicated for anything till i had a huge mental breakdown at 16 which cause me to do irreparable damage to by body with SH and unalive attempts. I had many manic episodes which caused most of the damage. I also developed what i believe is OCD in which everyone i've asked including 2 people who were diagnosed agree. I asked my therapist and he called it a phobia. (I've gone through 6 therapist at this point) at this point, since i was 12 aside from when i was 16, i have hidden any mental issues i've had to not risk the mental hospital. How to I communicate that i am struggling to make her listen?
Ever since COVID, my spouse and I stopped being intimate. I kept trying to help, listen, support, care, and then she finally admitted she didn’t trust me with her heart. Multiple years of counseling with no change. And the added message that I don’t support her goals…which I’ve been the primary source of income for nearly five years while they got accredited in their field, which was three years ago. Every time I want to talk or plan, they don’t have ‘bandwidth.’ I’ve isolated myself except for family. There have been many reasons why they’ve retread emotionally with things that have happened to them. Just … lonely. Sad. Old.
I can't do it anymore. i'm so tired. yes, tired. and burnt out, mentally and physically exhausted. i'm so sick of coming home. i'm sick of being punished and yelled at. I don't know if I can go on. I cant live like this. i'm so done trying to improve and be better. it seems to be making everything worse.
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
me and my boyfriend argued and he got mad at me for wearing a b neck night shirt infront of my sisters
Reading some of the comments people make about a body that looks like mine is really something. I feel like a fucking freak. Guess I'm going to have to cover up everywhere I go. It's 37°c tomorrow are you kidding me?
Im so tired of my dad physically abusing the animals is it bad that I want to go back to my emotionally abusive mom? -LG
I hate school so fucking much like oh my fucking god especially cuase im in a success academy school i feel like i have to be good, cool, smart, funny, PERFECT, but i cant i really just cant i use ai almost everyday and i cant stop please i cant do this school anymore
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
I know I'm supposed to love my body for all that it does for me. I've already accidentally developed anorexia once and I'm just lucky I wrangled myself out of it before it really really took hold but I don't feel cured. Not really. The only thing keeping me from going back to it is friends that would be mad at me. I want to be physically healthier but every time I focus too hard on it I just get unhealthy. I feel damaged. Like a freak walking around in a shapened body. It's not even I've developed these feelings from looking at people online it's people in real life.
School is tomorrow and i genuinely am so lost. I don’t even know any of my teachers. I don’t even know if I have any classes with my friends or what I’m even going to wear tomorrow. I don’t know what I’m going to learn, and I don’t know if I’m even going to learn anything. it’s like this every year. I hate going to school and forcing myself to be happy so teachers who act like they care show me that fake pity they do. Or when people ask if I’m okay, because what am I supposed to say to them? I can’t just tell them my feelings because then they get awkward and I get awkward and regret it. I hate that deep nauseous feeling I get when it’s the first day and all I can feel is misery and bile raising in my throat. What if nobody likes me? What if my teachers hate me and I’m gonna have to see them for the next idk months. what if I’m gonna fail everything and learn nothing but to hate myself even more? I don’t know what I’m gonna do.
I might be lgbtq I don’t know .but I know I’m questioning being a Christian.it takes back on some of its sayings and .i just don’t agree with the bible .if I did half of my doings would be sins and I wouldn’t be able to go to heaven. I just feel lost.i lost my identity and I don’t know how to get it back.
I’ll report yours and that bitch’s circle to the cybercrime for doxxing my friends and family and making fun of them online just to get at me
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
Yeah, keep talking sht about me in front of that btch for sum pussy. That’s what you wanted right? Bipolar ass with deep void who can’t stick to one woman
Fuckers can’t fathom I exist so they label me as AI lmaooo Jealous retards and their online delusions
I don't think I'm trans or anything but in all honesty I don't enjoy being a girl. I hate the clothes the styles, everything. I don't mean to say boys have it easier or anything I think I'd just be happier as one. But also I get so tired of people asking if I am a lesbian, even though i've told my friends and family I am not one they constantly make jokes and say things like 'the allegations must be true' and over time i've found myself joking about it to. I don't know why because deep down it still hurts even though i've told people I don't really care anymore.
the fact that you want to pry on my private life is disgusting Ugly ass nachos and his sunrise bych
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
My girlfriends mom is homophobic and keeps trying to tear her apart from me i wish i didn’t have to be away from her
Even though I'm constantly surrounded by friends I constantly feel alone. Either while i'm with them or as soon as I get home. I get really upset because I barely get any texts anymore and the one person that did talk to me randomly stopped, no explanation. But I also have a bad habit of being afraid to text people first so I'm kind of contradicting myself. But I'm always scared all of my friends are secretly annoyed with me and that they're just praying for me to shut up or leave. But my brain also tells me I have no reason to be sad, I have a good home life i'm I get pretty decent grades in school and there's nothing wrong with me yet I still feel empty all of the time. I've thought I'd gotten better but I was just distracting myself. My brain labels me as an attention seeker.
I kinda hate having curly hair I wish I had straight or wavy hair sometimes :( -LG