Recent Rants
fuck you elly i hate you I will never forgive you for how horrible you made me feel
I'm not enough I never will be i'm a failure I don't wanna be here I should die and never come back I'm useless, filthy, trash I don't belong here i'm fucking ugly i'm stupid fuck daily affirmations this is what I really am.
I'm a coward. A mistake, something you look at and go- "i feel bad for them!" NO no you fucking dont. thats why the scars HURT i dont wanna go! i really dont. but the pain is already stating to numb when i do this so I will keep going.
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
Why the fuck did we have to get neighbors that act like fucking untrained gorillas? If you wanna climb a tree bang on it or swing on a rope go to the frickin jungle wherever you belong. It's sure not near us. Geez.
i havent been eating. i googled my bmi and its like 19.6 which is fucking healthy but its a mix of id wanna be fat and im starving myself but i also wanna fucking kms so fucking bad and then i feel sick so i dont feel hungry fuck fuck fuck kms i needa kms so bad anyone have any strategies???
im scared. like rlly scared. one of my friends has attempted so many fucking times i fucking want to fucking die but i cant. they came out to me but i think they only did it cus their mother fucking told our fucking gym coach. idek if they would ve told me. i fucking want to kms so fucking bad. it hurts so fucking bad. but i dont have a fucking valid reason. like its like im not lgbtq, im not stupid, im not directly bullied, i go to a private school, i have 'friends', i dont have too many shit teachers, i go to gymnastics, im not too shit at it. but idk anymore. i told myself that i couldnt until they did but idk if i can wait anylonger. we even have a number system and our numbers out both shit. how do i tell them that i have been downplaying my numbers to make them not have a panic attack? how do i tell them that they need to read the letter i wrote for them? how do i tell them that imma go kms? how?
People just don't understand. It has to be an even number or a 5 it has to be my way or else I break down If something other people have touched a lot ends up in my hands I have to sanitize the area it touched and wash my hands. I have an anxiety attack during every storm I'm scare for flying I'm scared of cars I'm scared of bugs I'm scared of spiders I'm scared of losing people I'm scared I'm being judged I'm scared people secretly hate me I'm scared of so many things and every time I've tried to tell my parents they just tell me I'm safe especially with storms they just say your in the house nothing will happen but I'm still scared. I want to go to therapy or take a mental health test to actually get diagnosed. Not to diagnose myself but I think I have gad some sort of OCD and I think I might be depressed along with all the fears up there that are pretty severe so yeah
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
Rubbing salt in a wound fam invalidates how I feel, tries to shush me, and just says don't scare the dog as if that matters more than how I feel because I'm pissed off at people's shitty behavior. WHY THE FUCK DO YOU DO ME THAT WAY!?!?? WTF.
whoever just left me a note-ohh boy oh boy you are an AMAZING person. thank you sm you would never believe how much it helped-especially after receiving many un-supportive notes. I hope both sides of your pillow are at the EXACT temp you want it to be <33
No one texts me asking if I want to hang out with them, I always see my friends hanging out and having fun with no sign of them asking me and I feel jealous, maybe I deserve to be alone. I am a selfish man who tries to fulfill everyone's dream even if its not part of mine all for the sake of validation
I've been crying a lot by myself, I'm too scared to ask for help and even typing this makes me anxious. I make mistakes, we all do, but I just feel like I am doing too many mistakes and maybe the world would be better if I wasn't born at all
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
why does it hurt? why does it hurt so fucking much? why is it that the only thing i wanna do is kms? why is it that im too scared too? why am i like this? why doesn't anyone care? why am i too scared to ask for help? why do i cut myself so fucking often? why am i clean for 1 day and then do it 42 times the next? pls. i js want it to stop. PLEASE! why do i pray to god that he is real so he can fix me? why do all my friends hate me? why do i follow my friends instead of being part of them? why cant i do anything? why am i so fucking stupid? i need help.. please? why is the floor so fucking cold? why dont the pills work? why cant i stab myself? WHY?
i need medication for my ocd BAD... i don't think i should be stuck on one thought and one incident all day and i don't think it should make me want to die???
I'm bitter and hateful at life, life fucks you all. I wanted to dream, and live out my dreams, but my dreams are unrealistic by parents alike. I wanted to FUCKING make a anime, animated series. I can't draw, i can't animate. I can write but nobody will read it, i can draw but nobody will look at it. I have no skills, and the thing i like. The one thing i want to do. I can't. I have no skills but want it allll. I literally can't win anymore. Mu life is shit, i was born on this earth to do nothing but work myself to death. I didn't ask to be here, to be born and suffer like this, I didn't.
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
Made fun of for expressing my suicidal feelings. I'm either an expert like everyone else or a fraud. I know it's my fault for projecting my volatile emotional state onto those people instead of just doing what's best for myself.
I fucking hate you so much. I hate you SO FUCKING MUCH. I do my best to try to think of your positive sides and think of nothing. You call yourself 'realistic' then insult everything and expect people to like you. I get it's okay to have boundaries but that's all you fucking are. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. You talked to me while drunk and your words really touched me, you made me thought you actually cared about me even if it was hard to show but no, you return back to the fucking bitch I hate you as. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You invalidate my feelings constantly, belittle me, and make me insecure all while you cry too. I really hate how my mind makes me idolize you. I don't want to be you. I want to be better than you but you make it so hard to hate you for so long. Maybe that's just my ability to forgive so easily.
That obnoxious stomping really pisses me off ok. I'm 99 percent of the time quiet and bother nobody. Other fam just shrug it off or ignore. I get fed up of this shit. Grow tf you petty disrespectful salty ass bitches. It's fuckin bullshit.
I no longer have a purpose in life I feel myself becoming more useless and lazy by the day. Purpose is what gets humans moving and out of bed. But without purpose we're just drifters. Life becomes meaningless and what's the point of going through? Its not like I have some sob story I create my own problems. I just wish for an easy fix but I'm too much of a coward.