All Rants

I’m starting highschool but I live in a small town and we aren’t merging with many schools. I’m starting to get worried that I won’t branch out at ALL and I feel like I’m gonna be surrounded by the same people. Ik that I will see them (duh) but I really wanna start fresh and I have this gut feeling that I’m just gonna get bullied all over again

No one texts, and no one calls.

Everything that I'm good at, someone will always be better.

random shit turns me on throughout the day and I'm tired of it. stupid stuff, same stuff since I was 6 years old or even younger. not a time I can remember where I didnt feel like a pervert for daring to leave the house. All the confusion and stress of being a young child with sexual feelings and I couldnt tell anybody. and now all the confusion of being a young adult with sexual fixations, cant talk to people without my interests, they'll think I'm gross, cant talk to people with my interests online because I'm under 18, they'll just block me or prey on me. Tired of the confusion and the isolation.

SIX DAYS CLEAN Y'ALL. I didn't think about it once today except when writing this, its getting better. If you also struggle with addiction, don't give up, it always gets better.

Ashada masam done 👍 Gonna meet my fiancé again 🥰and get engaged in a few weeks 🥲

look at that blad sliding RIGHT across my skin guys 😂😂😂😂😂😂 hahaha this is so funny right hahhaha

i'm so ugly. i'm so so ugly. like a monster. i'm the ugliest. i was ranked last in the most ugly kid in my class two years ago. i fucking hate that. even one of my friends were there, and she had personally put me as last. like she could ever talk. fake ass bitch. i hate that they see me as the 'funny but not attractive funny', i just hate living tbh, but it's fine because everything will cheer up. right?

im so tired of my parents, they keep trying to get me into things i dont want to get involved with. I always have to go with what they think and what they want. When they found out about me scarring myself they started threatening me on how they would abandon me and how they would leave me. not to also mention the fact i used to be s/a'ed by my uncle, even tho my mom does know about it she still touches me innapropriately saying that its fine because "we are both women" i hate myself so much.

I am a grown woman, I still live with my parents since I just finished university studies so I do not have my own home yet. I talk a lot in call to online friends I've made through the years and I laugh a lot with them because we play games or just chat while we do hobbies. The thing is, my mother's bedroom is next to mine, and I was unaware of it but she was kinda listening. Thankfully she did not understand since I talked in another language, but the next day she did proceed to go on and tell me that she was rightfully upset and even humiliated because "I do not get or understand why you laugh with random people you've never met in real life, while you can’t even crack a smile with your father and I! Honestly, this is even unhealthy" and I just don’t know how to feel. She KNOWS that I don’t have many friends IRL after university, shouldn’t she be happy? Am I in the wrong? I don’t even know what to feel, I feel mostly embarrassment and shame...

i'm so so sorry dad that i can't be the daughter that you wished for, im sorry that i'm so stupid that i get Bs and not As like last year, i'm sorry for always making you mad and not proud. i want to die because of it, to die for my stupidity, to relief you of all your stress of me. im so sorry dad, but, i might overdose soon because of my existance.

Gm baby *wakes you up with gentle kisses* I just want to be cuddled by his big hands ☹️☹️

Why do I have a messed up sleep schedule? My online addiction is ruining my mental health. How am I supposed to work and be sane this way?

I just want to die so bad. Any tips to die get myself murdered?

hayley grace inspired im 14 rn: i edited the names age 1: enjoy the fact that you have no worries, one day u will miss it so fucking much age 2: eat as much as you want, one day u will be scared to age 3: play as much as you want, one day u will wish that you could again age 4: dont be friends with j_____e c__________s, she will call u the fattest and u will be insecure for yrs age 5: stay friends with a_____e, one day u will be so glad age 6: dont be friends with m____e but stay with a_a, one day u will know age 7: keep doin gym, one day u will be so glad u never stopped age 8: covid will stop age 9: be friends with t_____i and never be mean to her, one day she will be one of the only ppl u think care age 10: dont go to f_____k, one day u will regret it age 11: dont do diving, u will be tired of it and quit within 1 yr age 12: dont be friends with y___n, she will ruin ur life age 13: dont do it, itll be alright age 14: stay alive for as long as possibles

hey so im the person that wrote the hayley grace thing and to the person who told me not to namedrop yea i agree i shouldnt have i was rlly pissed and im sorry. but that was also my call for help. i want someone to see that connect the dots then ask me if im okay. but yes im sorry ik it was wrong and ik it was a breach of privacy and im genuinely so sorry i wasnt thinking straight but its not an excuse ik im sorry...

I got a late night buzz at my door saying "I've got a package for ____*my fiancé*" (my fiance currently lives in another state for work) I have a few things I know we ordered and are due to come in so I answer. He immediately starts asking me who I am and what my relationship is to my fiancé with a stack of documents in his hands. I accidentally let my first name slip but did not give away any more information other than he doesnt live here and I dont know when he would be back. I'm terrified. Shaking, crying, sick to my stomach with anxiety. I know he was being served but I have no idea what for or if I am somehow tangled in this mess. It is just one thing after another, I've bled myself dry and I CAN NOT keep doing this. Should I be anticipating law enforcement at my door? I have never dealt with anything like this before and I'm so lost and so scared. Thank you for any kind words or input 😢

I’m very tired of living right now and I feel like I’ve devolved so badly at a person. Everything scares me, and even stuff that should be “fun” makes me feel kind of ill. I don’t like leaving the house, and I especially don’t like driving, but I have to do both tomorrow and in places where I haven’t really been. It’s because a friend is in town and we haven’t seen each other in a long time, but it might not just be us (so a stranger will be part of things bc she asked if they could come along) and then part of the time is now going to be dedicated to her personal business instead of us just hanging out… and I know I just sound like I’m whining and like a bad friend, but I just can’t help it. I guess I need to reframe the whole situation so it’s less distressing to me but ah. Man I don’t know. Maybe I just suck. I should be better at a lot of things, but I’m not.

to a.z, im not trynna get attention ok? i genuinely js wanna know cus i feel like no one cares ok? my life is fucking crumbling ok? idk what to do ok? im js trynna survive but rn, i dont wanna go thru the actual dying process but i wann be dead ok? if udk what it feels like then im fucking jealous of u ok? ts not hate to u ok? idk what to do anymore. i overthought that so fucking much before releasing it cus i was scared that someone was gonna do that and judge ok? it took 11 days to finally release that again ok? im genuinely struggling and i would do that if i wasnt because ik that there r ppl genuinely wondering if anyone would care ok?

I hate that orange man so so fucking much just know that if you are a M@GA, you deserve genuine death. you deserve to be executed and burned at the stake sorry its really mean