All Rants

I’m pretty content with being alone it was hard at first having no friends but after a while I got used to it I mean from time to time I do wish I did have someone I could trust and just be myself around I do have an idea why I have no friends it’s probably because I’m really awkward and I just don’t open up to anyone like show them my true personality so I feel like most people just think I’m boring but I also need to put in more effort but I just get so nervous and overthink things like what if they were just being nice and don’t actually want to be my friend and I end just being annoying but I also don’t wanna graduate high school with no friends it honestly feels like I’m gonna be alone forever

I feel like a horrible person. Maybe i am a horrible person. Im disgusting and vile I cant control my emotions, i cant control my reactions, my actions I lost my friends because i was impulsive and couldn’t control my feelings I snapped at my mom accidentally. She ended up crying. What is wrong with me? I feel so bad for her, she deserves a way better child than me. i cant do fucking anything. Everything i do is somehow incorrect. I kinda wanna disappear. I think nobody should have to deal with me. Either that or just not feel anything at all I think i deserve to be alone.

I feel like most people in OSDD/DID spaces don't actually have it. I know it's bad to fakeclaim, but I'm tired of people constantly treating it like it's fun and quirky to have. Nobody ever discusses the dissociation, the PTSD, the memory issues, the sheer horror of having a disorder where your very being is split into many. You can never be one full self. It's fucking ridiculous. I see people drop their little act when it inconveniences them, while I and others suffer DAILY. I'm so fucking tired of "system spaces!!!" because yeah they can be great, but when it comes time to discuss symptoms of the disorder OTHER than alters everyone's silent because nobody fucking experiences it. Oh, integration? Why would you want to heal and have less dissociation?? Yea, nobody will tell you anything about it. Nothing wrong with functional multiplicity, but why does everyone supposedly want it? Not a singular person has dissociation bad enough to want to integrate atleast a BIT?? FUCKING POSERS!!

If you're gonna give shitty advice and be biased on your experiences. Respectfully DON'T RESPOND. Like just talking straight out of your ass. Do not respond to me. Because this is to vent/rant not for dumbasses to tell me I'm in the wrong because what do YOU know about ME. Fuck off, I don't want you to tell me that I suck because MY friends don't like me anymore. Like genuinely why the fuck do you care so much about my life. Go live your own life. Talking about some "Put yourself in their shoes" Like bitch no. I would never be that much of an asshole. How about you put yourself in my shoes and realize that I have seen how they act. You haven't. Nobody respond to this. This is just for me to get these feelings out. Thank you for reading this.

I hate the way I look so much. I feel so fat and chubby and overweight I'm not even sure what my body looks like. I'm 162 cm and 61kg and to me I feel ginormous. I can't do this. My Face is round, I have chapped small lips and a large forehead and a horrendous side profile. Not to mention my hair. It's naturally curly and I straighten it all the time because I feel so insecure when it's curly. I don't know why I hate myself as much as I do but I don't know how to stop it.

I believe that my friend's death was my fault, they were my first love that I had and we both were so young. We both were online dating on a chat site, we were close and talked to each other every day. But we both were going through stuff. I had to stop them from committing twice, and it started to make my mental health go down each time. I started to isolate myself and have bad thoughts. Though, my family didn't care. Even though I have tried to tell them. But one day, my device got taken away and I couldn't talk to them. And after nearly a year, I logged on and went to our private chat. They said that they were going to commit, having gender dysphoria and other problems. They didn't log on since last December. Now I'm scared to go back on, scared that they will log on and I wasn't there for them again, or log on and they still didn't answer. I wish I was there for them, to be there. But I also feel free, I don't feel weighed down by their problems. I'm sorry, Alton. -ON

god im so fucking sorry w and l, i pray to god at times that time would just go back to the start of this month so i could never had made that fucking mistake, i wish i had never pressed that block button, i wish i had never taken s' advice, i wish i had thought it over. if i had done atleast one of those things, then maybe we would still be friends. but now i feel like all of you guys hate me and resent me and think im this vile and disgusting person and honestly, theyre right. i am all of those things, and i hate myself so fucking much for it.

Putting on a bra feels like a humiliation ritual since I have none. It also feels like guys want girls with boobs as if having boobs makes a girl feminine and a girl. But I feel like no matter how hard I try to be feminine I still feel like a disgusting slob. I just want to feel pretty and good in my own skin. But I don't. And I hate myself. Everytime I try to style myself i feel like I have a mental breakdown i hate being myself

it feels like they’re slowly drifting away from me. i can’t do anything about it though. i hate myself for it.

None of my clothes look good. I look so ugly and pathetic. I'm not pretty like any of the other girls. And I don't have the great exciting personality like them either. I'm depressed and I bring the mood down. I don't have no one to talk to. I just feel so ugly. And I wish a guy would talk dirty to me again. And want md sexually. But I haven't been able to get out of my room and be somebody. And if I could then I would only hope to find someone that actually loves or friendship. But no one will ever love me cuz I'm so me. So disgusting. And no friends ever choose me

I hate myself that me and some rando on omega masturbated to each other even tho he was 18 and I was 16, he thought I was 18, I’m that desperate, everyone on there keeps calling me cute even tho in not, why do people keep lying to me? Do they know how much I hate myself? How much I know I’m ugly?

One of my parentals never says "I love you" to me, they say I'm a weirdo and never actually love me sometimes. They argue with my family a lot, push away any other relatives, and has a lot of pride of themself. I just want to be loved by them and want to be loved by everyone. I try my best to be good and try to make people like me. But its so hard. -ON

I have this like friend and I love her she's so sweet at times but like that's the problem I think. I don't know if I like like her or not cause she calls me nice stuff she says I love you to me like a lot and she's even done a unsent project about me. Like I don't know, I think I'd happily date her but she's so like bipolar like she gets so jealous and when I upset her it's like she hates me. I literally need to walk on eggshells around her cause the second I mess up it's like I just don't mean anything to her. It bugs me SO much because I have no clue how I feel about her and she's so jealous like it's almost as if I'm not allowed my own friends but she is?? She's literally matching with someone else but the second I sent a screenshot of my chat with someone cause they said something nice it's all "it's ok I get this all the time" like I'm gonna ditch her for talking to someone else. It's so so stupid and it pisses me off so bad and I just don't know what to do anymore I'm so upset

I just had a semi fight with my college friends. We were all in one taxi cause we commute together to school (that's what we did last year) and nobody has a driving license, today, 4 days before uni starts, I ask them and they tell me that i can't go with them cuz my house is the farthest away and they basically tell me to find a taxi myself (I can't do that I'm not that rich). I know why they hate me, it's because my mom is a professor in college and they feel as if I have a privilege. I don't, even though I chose the same major I entered the uni with my grades (and there's no discount btw for students whom parents are professors so neither I nor my parents have gained anything) I think I'm deemed to be hated like this for the rest of my life honestly. I have never had a "group" of friends before. I do have a best friend from high school, but she can hang out with her other friends as well. I don't know man maybe I'm being dramatic but this really made me sad,wish I had friends man

I'm incredibly in love with one of my best friends and he doesn't like me back. I've been extremely obvious, kind of on purpose, so he almost definitely knows. It's kinda weird though because we sorta dated before (it was in middle school and we didn't actually like each other, we just confused our platonic feelings for romantic ones). Yesterday I had been leaning close to him, and one of our friends said "you two are so gay" (he's a trans man and I'm nonbinary). He brought up how we're exes to prove how nothing like that would ever happen again, and it was a more subtle hint. Then today he said something along the lines of "I don't want to date any of my friends, not again." That was a much less subtle hint. I had to laugh along with him and agree, but it hurt really bad. I don't know what to do. I guess all I can do is love him from afar, because I'd rather have him as a friend than as nothing.

I long for a reliable father figure and someone who respects and doesn't sexualize every girl on the street. I wish my dad never viewed me that way. I wish he respected women. I wish 13 year old me never had to feel self conscious if he was ever staring at my body. I wish I was more than just a girl to be sexualized and avoid getting into these weird scenarios made up by my dad, bc that's all he ever thinks about. What girls wear (ONLY girls specifically), whatever thought that comes to him first when he sees a girl, staring at girls irl or online, etc. Most days I feel like it's more comfortable to be a guy bc I always see them having it better (not putting down whoever goes through similar). That way I don't have to worry about my dad lusting over me . I hate my dad and I wish I grew up with someone better.

Villains aren’t born, they are made. Mike wazowski had rights to be a villain. Behind every villain is someone broken who deserves love just as much as you do. I take that back..if you’re like Jeffery do**** (iykyk) then you deserve death.

My parents have spilt up recently and my dad tried everything in his power to get back with my mom. She wasn’t interested at first, but for the past week and a bit my parents have been sleeping in the same bed, which for a few weeks before hand they wouldn’t even look at each other properly, so it’s a bit of a start to fixing their marriage. If I’m being honest and this is so so selfish of me to say, I sort of hope the don’t get back together. My mom ended things with my dad by just telling him she wasn’t in love with him anymore and that feeling apparently has been there for months now. My main reason why I don’t want the back together is because how can you go from falling out of love with you partner you’ve known and loved coming on 20 years, and to just break it because of 3 months worth of feelings? But at the same time I want whatever is best for my family

My friend is boring. They wake up, work, go home, sleep, repeat the next day. They ask me the same questions everyday, like clockwork. I've tried to liven up the conversation with other topics, but it always ends up the same way. I'm tired of it and some days, I don't want to respond.

💪🏻✨ I’m getting tired chat……😕😕😕😕😕😕