All Rants

im so dissatisfied with you. im so unhappy

I'm filled with nothing but anger. I want nothing more than to hurt my family in some unimaginable way. Everything was my fault. I just had it so good my siblings needed to do everything in their power to tear me down limb from limb. They get older and look for support. Tell me about their traumas, then quickly want to look away from mine. I'm always a reminder of their sacrifices, like I owed them my self esteem in return. I don't think they would ever want to know, I don't think I can tell them anything genuine. It would mean anything they apparently did was for nothing. It meanshey deserve every ounce of self hate they give themselves. So I need to carry it alone. Otherwise when they tell me they love me it's hollow. All they did was abandon me. Scream at me about their shit being in the wrong spot while I'm internally rotting in a relationship with an older man at 16. Looking for validation I never recieved. Why does the idea of hurting them make me want to die somewhere awful.

How do I tell my mom my anxiety is getting worst?? She doesn’t even listen to me. Someone help me

I don’t know what I have to do to be a “Good Christian” I feel like their is so much rules. Like don’t gossip, and dress modestly (like what does that mean where do I draw the line? and why can’t I just wear whatever? I mean ofc I have common sense but still) and also rules like don’t curse, don’t get drunk, and read ur bible daily, and pray a lot, and listen to good Christan music and not curse word music, and don’t be mean, and always be super patient, and worry about others before yourself, and love yourself but also don’t love yourself too much bc then u are being prideful. Like idk how much of the bible a day is good bc i used to be super good about reading my bible and i read a lot of it daily. But the last two months i have been only reading the daily bible verses which sometimes I forget to do. And sometimes I am randomly hunger for gods word or worship music. But sometimes I want to distance my self from god.Or i believe I can handle life on my own. But I still go backto god

sighhhh laptop needs a new hard drive…

Hey guys... It's been 3 weeks since I told my crush/friend that I like him. He never responded... I'd rather he reject me than not respond. I hate that I had confidence that you wouldn't be a total coward and a prick and not respond, thanks a lot asshole, I have lost all feelings for you. I hope you have a great life, S. And fuck you too the person who convinced me to confess. Fuck everyone ESPECIALLY YOU! As for anyone reading, I hope you have a great life.

So idk how to start this bc I never really talk about my problems with anyone. Btw tw starving! I'm really trying to lose weight, and rn I'm like starving myself since 2 days I feel hungry but also I know if I eat now I feel guilty about eating something. I wouldn't say I have ed bc idk I'm just trying to lose weight and I tried everything fr everything. Nothing helps. I wanna know how can I eat something without feeling guilty? (And I don't wanna hear something about like "2 days ain't much" I AINT TRYING TO WIN A COMPETITION OR SUM HERE :,D ) Thank you for reading (And also sorry for my bad english)

I have a genuine questionnnn sooooo I just started my first week of high school and I already am procrastinating homework. How can I make sure this doesn’t continue. Bc it’s gets so stressful when I do this. And it is really annoying. And sometimes it’s not just procasinating but attually just not doing it and bringing my grade down or leading to me failing a test bc I did not study or do homework. Or the homework I did do I cheated on and used ai…… 😬 Btw I think I have adhd even tho I have not been diagnosed bc I don’t want to be put on any meds. But yeah and ofc I know litteraly EVERYONE thinks they have adhd so yeah.

I really dislike it when my cousin is high because nothing feels genuine between us. She believes that being high is who she truly is, but in reality, it brings out her worst qualities. It's hard to ignore this, as it's quite obvious. She has been vaping and smoking blunts since middle school, and she takes pride in that. I don't understand how she can be proud of it; she's harming her own health for the sake of having fun and feeling "free."

When will I see my worth? When will my self esteem be higher? I wish I could see what my friends value about me. I always feel inadequate 🫤

So, I’m GenX (may not matter) & white. I was raised by a free thinking family (so I thought). At 20 I got pregnant, by a black man. By the time my daughter was 5 my mom was the only family member (besides my very racist father) that spoke to me. I NEVER heard my mom’s family say a negative word about any race, I knew where my father stood. I will say that when my dad saw his granddaughter he cried & changed. But how tf did I miss the fact mom’s family is racist? 30+ I haven’t heard from them, the universe protected us. My aunts, uncles are dying & are now asking me for forgiveness. I want to tell them to f**k themselves. They caused so much pain & mentally f**ked us up. I don’t want to be “the bigger person” I want them to see & feel our feelings I want them to ask my daughter for forgiveness not me. How. Tf. Did. I. Miss. This? They missed out on our love & joy! They believe in reincarnation (sp?) I hope they all come back as what they looked down on. Assholes

My cousin has a big fucking head. I can’t stand him. We used to be really close when we were kids. As we got to our teens we slowly became less close. He’s two years younger than me. He’s always had this arrogant personality about him. We are both from a different country and he thinks that he speaks that language better than me because he’s been to that country more and I’m not very confident and so he always likes to show off and speak that language even though we are in America. I think in the back of my mind every time I try to speak that language I get self-conscious because of him. Him and his older brother also bully my older sister. That’s why I don’t allow myself to get close to them because they might bully me too. Before my cousin would facetime my sister and they were close. I always wondered what was wrong with me. There is absolutely nothing wrong with me. It is all him. I look at everything clearly and I start to wonder. I really hate him.

Why the fuck do people have to spam/ troll a venting site? If that doesn't say what's wrong with world I don't know what can.

I've came to the realisation that NOTHING i say or do is ever going to be good enough for anyone and that people would rather show their praise to others than to actually show me how proud you are of me. The reason I have anxiety, depression and all these pent up worries is cause all I ever heard was criticism, judgment, shown where I went wrong and why couldn't I do / get better

Ky$ piece of sht Go fuck her if you like her so much

I'm scared people will secretly hate my face but continue being friends with me because they like hanging out. I am not necessarily ugly, but I don't look like anyone else I've ever seen. My eye shape is very weak (this alone is my biggest insecurity) with negative tilt, I have a big nose, and my features are arranged in a very plain way. What if I am nice, funny, cool to hang with, but everyone is secretly irritated with my face and can't say it? I already feel this way quite strongly towards some strangers I see and I'm terrified it'll happen to me.

When being told you've "triggered" someone then proceed to list all of the things that makes me a bad person, but to then threaten not being invited to a fucking wedding that is never gonna happen and all when you can clearly tell i'm in either in a mental crisis or grieving - plus to make me feel like an absolute arsehole for the fact I said my grandmother dying shat all over my engagement. 1) I WOULD GIVE EVERYTHING TO HAVE HER BACK 2) JUST CAUSE YOUR GRANDPARENTS WERE CLOSE TO YOURS DOESN'T MAKE IT A STANDARD EVERY FUCKING GRANDPARENT SHOULD BE EXPECTED TO BE 3) FUCK OFF WITH YOUR FUCKING EGO CENTRIC MANIPULATIVE RANT .... IF IT WAS "THE ME SHOW" then you would have fucked off loooong ago. And as someone with ADHD and RSD cheers for getting me back to the paranoid worried 21 year old I so longed to get over - compassion and emotional intelligence - FUCKING LEARN ABOUT THESE THINGS BEFORE YOU OPEN YOUR FUCKING MOUTH AGAIN!!!!!!

I hate how i still them till now after everything that has happened

I want his body so muchhhh. I love his hands TnT

Tie me up and use me as your toyyy Mmmnh.. trust me I’m not faking it