All Rants

It’s upsetting that they left me. They left me for good. I feel like I’ve lost everything even though I’ve still got good people on my side. It’s so hard to let go because it was years of deep relationships within that group and I did it to myself. Now I only feel like I’m bringing down those who are still there for me. God I’m hopeless and I wish I wasn’t like myself. I feel like I’m at the edge of a cliff already, I’m not even scared of leaving anymore. But then again if I leave, I’d upset those that been with me through my rough days. Then I’d be selfish. I don’t know what to do anymore and I feel lost. I’ve lost it all.

My grandpa is dying he has cancer in his jaw and i feel so self aware and lost in the world i wish i can help him wish i would have had more time with him i just feel like i wasn't there when i was an adult or when i was a kid but he says other wise i feel so empty i don't know how else to express these emotions other then writing i am not sure what i will do when he passes away i think everyone will be in a state of sadness on top of it my moms going to spiral and drink her feelings away i just feel like in the middle of a really bad earthquake

There’s a man who comes into my job with his teen kids sometimes, he seems like a good dad. I started developing an obsession for him and i know it’s bc I have daddy issues. I was ringing him up today and i swear at one point he was undressing me with his eyes and it made me feel like i was on fire. I want to see him all the time and i want to know him more and i want him to tell me I’m oretty and do awful things to me

I want us to spend the rest of our lives together. I really hope you propose this year because I am so madly and deeply in love with you. The last 4 years have flown by since you came into my life, and the only regret I have since we got together is that we couldn't meet sooner. We've looked at rings before, and found a few affordable options that we both would like, and now I'm just...ardently awaiting for that day, whenever it may come. I did say that I wanted it to be a surprise, but now I'm just waiting and simmering in my own anticipation. Im in love, with you, with us, and I dearly hope it stays that way forever. If the last 4 (almost 5) years are any indication, than I think that we'll be just fine.

Your birthday is coming up in a few days. I asked what your plans were, and you told me that you were going to hang out with your friend after work before going out to dinner with your family. And tbh, I could help but feel a pang of jealousy that you were going to hang out with another friend instead of me. From a logical standpoint it makes sense, you both have been friends for almost a decade so wanting to hang out with them on your birthday isn't a weird concept. In fact it's perfectly natural. While, we've only known each other a couple of months and only talk at work or online. I guess, I just really wish I could be a part of that inner circle ya know? I want to know you like she does, but that takes time. I just...click with you, and I'm trying to figure out if you clicked with me too? Idk, it's like one moment it feels like we're complete strangers, and the next, it's like we're chatting like we've been friends for ages. It's so confusing, and I just wish things were clearer...

May God guide me to become a better person. I'm sick of my life. I'm disgusted to myself. I don't know if I still deserve his love. I just want to end this and start a new one..

i got F at exam, thats all....

I work with a bunch of immature childhood baggage-carrying tools.

my whole school friend group turned against me because of this girl who claimed she was my bff (she never was) who I cut off + a failed situationship (all of them in the same group along with me). I thought the drama was done. I didn't wanna fight with anyone anymore but out of nowhere my only friend in my classes told me that she didn't want to talk to me anymore because she felt uncomfortable since she's talked trash about me behind my back a bunch of times??? so now the whole group hates me except for the only other guy and the weirdo girl (she's a sweetheart but we're not really close). I thought we ended things ok with my situationship but apparently she hates me and is saying stuff about me WHICH SCARES ME because we trusted each other so much so she has a LOT of embarrassing stuff about me that I wouldn't have told anyone else. Basically I went from having like 15 friends to only a couple and I also have to coexist with this group everydar for another year I'm so stressed

Me and my fiancée broke up, and i wish i never let my walls down, all he did was break my heart

IM SO SCARED- I was checking my spotify and saw an update so i checked and turns out it’s my exs profile. out of curiosity i check her profile and see some playlists, im there it says SHES MOVING TO WHERE I MOVED (freaking moving countries.) and she’s going crazy at the idea of seeing me again. we’ve been over for three years at least, and im so scared because my life is going okay so far but she always found a way to stress me. plus, she caused me several anxiety episodes and several psychology visits because she always came to me whenever she felt like not living anymore, thing that happened often. and introduced me to negative ways of coping, im scared of seeing her ever again. she will ruin my friendships, everything.

When I was around 8 years old my mum left and my dad was emotionally unavailable and not involved in my life for any reasons other than paying for essentials. 5 years ago a girl came into my life that taught me what love was and it was so overwhelming me to me. I couldn’t tell her that I loved her for months because it was too much for me to say. || She killed herself around a year after dating and I hated myself so much, for two years I treated myself below everyone and everything and cut myself everyday to punish myself. Ive gotten drunk really drunk tonight and can’t stop thinking of her and starting to hate myself for failing the one person who taught me what love was. I’ll prob regret saying all of this in the morning but I feel like I have to say it. || There’s a lot more I can say but just wanna let you all know that no matter what happens in life, I promise things will get better and you matter to someone or make a difference in someones life no matter what you think

I've spent months looking for a job and I just got one but now I might get kicked from where I'm living and lose it

i feel like i can’t talk to anyone at all. i don’t feel comfortable with anyone. i can’t trust anyone when i feel vulnerable. my friends just look at me and treat me like some joke. my parents say that im not “tough” enough, or blame it on my hormones. there’s just too much going on. i hate it

I was recently js scrolling and a video popped up on my fyp. A guy i fell in love with a while back singing and dancing with a few other guys on a stage. I miss him so much, i think about him often. How he is, what he is doing, if hes taking care of himself. We used to talk about music all the time, he was always so passionate about it and i loved to listen. One time we stayed up all night just talking about everything and nothing. I told him about the stars and how bright they were, how much i love looking at them. It felt like i was in a movie because he said i was the prettiest star he loved looking at and kissed me. We never dated, but i wonder what we could have been.. im so happy and proud of him but i just wish i could have my sweet boy back even if he was never really mine. Ill always keep our promise safe in my heart Mar <3 It was kind of crushing to see, but yeahh lol

I want to give up. Please god, please show me the way out of this darkness. Please. I need to escape this hell. I need to be okay again. I need myself. I need me. Please.. I know you'll hear me

My older brother has been making jokes. And not just any joke no no. He's been saying " im going to kill my self" in a fake crying vocie, he said it jokingly but it made me really uncomfortable ( because I self harm and blah blah blah) but it was me and my older sister in the house and she didn't do shit about it

I always feel an ineffable sadness, lingering over me for no particular reason. I feel like my friends enjoy being around me but they all have other people they like more. Sometimes I get so weird and awkward that I just start thinking about kms. I wish that I didn’t have selfish thoughts like that but I do and I don’t want to tell people I know since it will burden them or make them angry at me. Another thing is the environment, by 2030 global warming will be irreversible. Nobody cares about the environment anymore and I hate the lack of awareness for it since everyone has pretty much lost hope. If it was up to me the environment would be fixed but it’s a group effort yk?

Going through a breakup after a 1 year relationship right now. She was so good looking and had such a great personality but we just had way too many arguments and she ended up breaking up with me. I feel like I'll never find anyone again. She was my first love and I'm 25 now. I eat 1 meal every 2 days and stay in bed all day. Any suggestions to get over it?

I am so numb and withdrawn. I have a seven year old and I’m not currently working. I don’t have any friends at the moment and every conversation I have feels so surface-level. I feel isolated due to my circumstances and I’m weighed down by grief of family conflict and not having any support or outside outlet to dump some of my problems onto, so they just stay harbored within. I’m so fucking sad. I know I’m impactful to my child, but some days, it doesn’t even feel that way either. I feel like my smugness shows on my face around people and I feel exposed, like they can see directly into my core and sense what lingers there…. All the unresolved trauma. I’m just longing for true, in depth conversation to keep me afloat. I need a fucking friend. I feel like even one person who makes me feel seen/heard would make a world of a difference. Times are hard.