All Rants

I feel like I can't have an original thought or anything that might be converse to my partner's opinion. And he come to me for my opinion on everything, but if I disagree or poke holes in his perfect plan then I am the bad guy. Like if you want to be right, don't ask for my opinion. Am I the asshole? Probably, but fuck. Let me at least be my own person too.

I feel worthless I feel like no one can love me the way I need.. I feel hopeless.. I feel sad.. and I feel like im drowning.. I feel overwhelmed... and I have no where to go because I cant trust anyone..

Long story short, my partner had a business that he started with a previous spouse when we got together. I was bartending which wasn't a long term career for me, so I stepped in to serve as a sort of office manager/project estimator/accountant/floating help. This ended up becoming my career, and while it didn't spark my heart, it made my partner happy. Fast forward through the years and the expectations grew as I was more comfortable in the field. Ultimately, the burn out was consuming us both and something had to give. The universe intervened and we ended up having to shut down operations due to damage to our work space. We rented and the land lord refused to make repairs. So we finally closed the doors. This was a few years ago. Now I have my own job that supports our family and he does some side work. Today he came to me with an idea to do some estimate writing to help people dealing with insurance companies after a big storm. Problem for me, he profits and I'm doing the work!

I don’t know how i feel about things going on with me.

I try to be nice to people I just get made fun of in return I wanna talk to to people but they make fun of my looks why tf is this world so cruel the only people that are nice are family

I fucking ruined my throat screaming again. The isn't as bad as this disgusting house lol:D

I wish I was more outgoing. I feel like I have some fucking personality disorder with the way act. Well thats what my mum has been telling how I act so shy and depressed oustide home or anywhere else except it. I feel like something is wrong with me and I feel like if I had never acted so loud or confident in my house but kept the same quiet composure then my mum wouldn’t need to complain. People have seen me in class and outside and they’re probably thinking how there must be something wrong with me like how could I act such like a different person? My friends are so much more better people than me, they don’t even know how I act without them there. I’ve made people hate me because of my weird ass quiet self and I hate it. I hate myself I hate myself. Every time I see myself I hate who is there.

I used to be the top kid who got the higher grades but I’m slowly getting worse.. I feel like such a disappointment for my parents and whenever I get my test scores back I feel so fcking sad like a fcking loser and I never tell my parents about tests. But if they knew the truth I can’t handle the look on their faces or how mad they would be.

I truly feel Im the most fcking ugliest friend in my group. They have clear skin, a skinny body, a confident personality, theyre good at sports, they wear good makeup, they wear different hairstyles every day, they have healthy hair, they have friends outside our friend group, they talk to other people without getting scared. Why can’t I be like that? Ever since I graduated I promised myself that next year I’d be a complete changed person. Im not. I feel like I’ve gotten even worse. I shut myself from people, Im truly alone without my friends. Just today my teacher said to get into pairs and I was the only one left. I felt so lost and scared that everyone was looking at me because I was the only one standing alone. Then a girl said I could join their pair and she was such a sweetheart god bless her. But, I couldn’t help feel so utterly pathetic :(

I’m sorry to everyone who had to meet me. Im an insufferable jerk who just can’t handle being with people I don’t know because I’m too much of a coward, because they would judge me for who I am. There’s nothing about me thats beautiful and personality matches it. I wish I wasn’t alive

Im tired physically and mentally, im tired of everything,

I feel so bad about all of the people I wronged, every single day the guilt in me grows as much as my thoughts starts to became intrusive. I hate that I am such a quarrelsome person, every single person who I deeply trust and cherish had been dissapointed in me because I can't fucking shut my mouth when it's needed and I feel guilt afterwards. It doesn't matter how much I apologise, if I know for sure it will definitely happen again. I hate being like that. Negativity filled me up. Everything I say is negative. Everything about me is negative. I hate myself. I'm going to attempt today. So my friends who I wronged and hurt will be finally free from such a jerk like me.

Those who agree with Andrew Tate are real stupid and don't care they are being ripped off

Andrew Tate and his business are nothing but sexism pigs (sorry they are not pigs as pigs are cleaner), a cult and scam artists ripping men off, like those make money quickly and easily scams. So I am glad Andrew was arrested and put in prison for life.

i want to die , i never asked to be born . why cant u just abort me in the first place mother ? if in the end u js gonna say that u regret having a child like me . tell me mother if i die will u finally be happy ? will u enjoy the silence ?

i feel like im losing myself.. im tired.. my body hurts literally everywhere. my heart ache it feels like i was being stabbed by a knife :)

It's so demoralising. The pay's late again.

i hate school... get me out of here... being a teen is NOT fun

I wish I was that one overly inquisitive kid, who always asked questions to be met with a knowing smile. I remember watching the achievements of everyone else while being a flunk out, a convoluted fuck up. I was pushed past my whole life, talked over, spat upon by condescending social workers, whom I'm sure I don't fully grasp how they're standing there without simplifying it in police functions. I had a trashy education, trashy parents, clueless authority in my life, and my role models up to now were all muscle-brained idiots. I know I have no insides. I was thrown out of my sleep and now I'm disturbed. I think I want to feel the cannibalism of a man becoming vulture, not the aspect of measurement.

Why is everyone so fake nowadays? Its impossible to find a friend who is actually genuine and not such a jerk. One of my oldest friends started ignoring and ditching me and my sister for her "popular friends" , shes a liar too, when her mom noticed her bad behavior she said that it was her popular friends fault! But some of her popular friends are actually nice and way better than her. Its not fair she hasnt gotten the consequences of her actions and how people think shes a good person...