Rant #2488

It's truly laughable how clumsy I am, how I always knock everything over or make basic mistakes in establishing comfort with others. I can't tell when or how I'm being annoying, I just know that I'm not wanted anywhere. It's only a matter of time before I go tumbling over the bookshelf, bumping into walls, making a fool of myself, damaging equipment because of how simple I am. I see ridiculous, conceited, self-loathing posts like this across the internet and it angers me how common I am. I'm so frustrated living day to day, it feels that I can't do anything right and I'm forced into loneliness or trying to half-think myself into mimicking the people that have been spoken for. I know I don't have any practical intelligence nor booksmarts, all I have is this stupid laughable envy conceited as ambition when it's a tragic, social mockery. I don't truly want anything or to go anywhere, I just want to stop the feeling that everyone is laughing at my slightest mistakes.