Rant #2283

I've felt like shit since my girlfriend left me. I've been sleeping less, talking to others less often, and not eating as much—all that kind of shit. Nothing feels worth it anymore. I've just been rotting away in my room, leaving occasionally to eat or for hygiene. I've been nothing but a loser in my room, playing shitty games, calling with the only real person I trust, doomscrolling for hours on end, and doing the thing that makes me hate myself the most, masturbating. I've continued to do this nearly every night when I'm alone, when it's dark and late. I can't stop myself from doing it. I would've stopped. I actually did when I still had her in my life. Now that she's gone, I've only began to worsen. I want nothing more than to blow my brains out tomorrow.