Rant #2235

uh this is more a vent than a rant because i don't want to talk to someone directly right now i was clean for awhile you know I don't know why I'm here, I'm being pretty childish. I could talk to anyone around me, but it's too hard right now. I can't. I tried being vulnerable and venting, then I just. snapped. I don't think I can go back now, it feels like I'm in shame and I can't fix anything. I know I technically could, but I feel so unloved and ignored. I don't know why. People care. It just hurts. I don't know if this counts as going against policy but it's after such events, i im sorry