Rant #2142

The voices have gotten worse again and I am unable to do anything about it other then bare with the emotions and extreme low episodes. People say they care but all I end up seeing and hearing is that they care but while I'm useful, I wanna believe I matter; that I am valued but the feeling just keeps getting worse and worse each day. Apart of me is starting to think there is no meaning to my life; Nobody will miss me or notice I was even struggling I have tried far too hard to lie to myself. I've always feared the idea of death; as of late it seems to be my only form of comfort from the worldly issues I bare.