Final exams are up (I have one literally tmrw that could impact my semester grade badly) and I know I need to study, but everything feels useless, worthless. I don’t feel motivated when I’m alone. It’s like the second I’m out of anyone’s view or space, anything other than apathy disappears. I want to feel; I feel hapoy other times, hell I just told my mom I’m the happiest I’ve been and I MEANT it. Why can’t it just stay consistent? I want to have good grades I do, but putting in the work for it just isn’t clicking. I’m going into art anyways, why do academics matter?! Why should I care about calculus, except I do and the problem is I’m a good enough student I still get B’s so theres no consequences and I keep sliding by. Honestly even with consequences I don’t think it would change anything. I just want to feel, I want my passion back, I want to succeed in school but everything feels useless.