Rant #1900

i feel pathetic i feel like the only friends i have arent even real ones like theyve treated me like shit and made me cry so many times but when they come back and apologise all i can do is accept it and be like its okay i forgive you but when i do one thing wrong in their eyes they throw me away like im nothing, only for them to come back and realise they were wrong and stuff. ill tell you some of the stuff theyve done before like they invited me out once and then proceeded to ditch me an dleft me with someone i hate and only one of them apologised and when i tell you i cried because why would you even invite me out. once i had beef with this racist girl they all were "friends" with and they didnt even like her like they always used to talk shit ab her but when i acc confronted her they all got mad and dropped me and didnt speak to me for months and it was so humiliating going to school with no one, no friends no nothing and ik they were talking shit ab me too.