Rant #1896

The boy like is kinda just like me, today in school it was 6th period the second to last period in school, all of his friends were being loud at the front of the class while he was just sitting in his seat. I think the looked at me but I might just be delusional as always. I don’t think he will ever notice me sadly because idk if he likes black girls and I called him chopped to my friend (bc he walked past me and my friend and was saying “everyone is chopped” to his friend) and it would be really weird to tell my bestie that I like him when I talked smack about him. I like him but at the same time i dont like him, for example one time in class we were doing an experiment with socks and his whole table had white socks and the teacher tried to give him a black one and he said “I don’t like black ones” am I overthink this? Yes but I don’t stand a chance with him bc I’m so freaking ugly and I don’t know how to style my hair as a black girl. I just don’t feel confident in my skin anymore.