I feel like I have this strange obsession with wanting to be everyone’s favorite person and to be chosen, it just sucks when I’ve gone through my whole life knowing that I’m no one’s first thought, so I over compensate to try to be. It seems to come so naturally to others, where people just prefer them but I just feel as if I’m never good enough. I get weird and jealous I don’t show it but it’s a thought in my mind when I see somebody I want to be closer with be closer to somebody else. And I hate that about myself, I hate that I feel this way and I hate how I create my whole cause of hurt and pain because of this. I just want to be noticed for once, and not have to notice others first
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