All Rants

I'm my biggest hurdle. I stop myself from doing fun things. I have pathological demand avoidance and it manifests like anxiety and panic attacks. Right before I'm about to do something fun or anything that I have intended to do for a while my brain gives me a panic attack until I'm unable to do anything. Then I regret not doing what I was meant to do and it eats me from the inside out. Yesterday was meant to do something really really incredible and not even an hour before I was meant to leave the panic attack came and I had to cancel. I had the earliest nights sleep I think I've had in over a year I slept for 16 hours. I had several bouts of sleep paralysis and night terrors, I think because I regret not going and my subconscious is really trying to work through how much I hate my demand avoidance. Plus I don't want to be a burden to my friends. I don't want to go into detail and unload onto them especially when I haven't known them that long. I just don't want to be a burden.

i don’t know how to communicate or open up. my family life is horrible and it’s eating away at me. i just want to isolate myself. i love my friends and i don’t want them to worry about me but i don’t know what to do. summer has been horrible since im just stuck with the people that drain all my energy.

i just feel so ugly and weird. my family comments negatively on my appearance at least once a week or more. they make fun of me because i’m underweight with fast metabolism and i literally cannot gain any weight. they tell me my face looks funny, my nose is big, they tell me i look 12 because i wear baggy clothes, they’ve ruined tight clothes for me. they laugh at my interests, they tell me im weird, they call my hobbies ugly or laugh at my crafts/art. they’ve shattered my self esteem and confidence entirely.

i wish my mom loved me. she loves my little brother so much more. she doesn’t care what he does yet she controls everything i do. She doesn’t care that his friends are genuinely horrible but cares that my friends are gay. he does something bad or disrespectful? no punishment. i talk back or forget a chore? i need to lose my attitude and go do the chore now. i just want to be loved by my own mother.

i feel like i’m just nothing. i’m just a side character in everyone’s lives that im close to. friends barely reach out to me, no one ever checks up on me, my mom doesnt care how i feel. i just wish i wasn’t so bland and people pleasing.

I dont get to be pissed at my family. I see we are better now, but nobody sees anybody else the way they wanna be seen. Sister still angry at mom, no understanding or willingness to discuss it with her. Mom is fed up with trying to talk with sister about it and always getting nothing but accusations and refusal to discuss further. Both are asking me to be right in the middle of it. Because I am somehow always the root of it. I'm sorry, I was a shitty kid who needed extra support. I didn't know sister would think my parents loved me more. I'm sorry I hurt you, I was a kid with behavioral issues and I was scared as fuck. I thought I was gonna get sent away or kicked out of school and you can't take no as an answer to anything. I'm sorry I seem to be the person everyone thinks is the root to all of this. I'm sorry I don't spend time with the family when it always has a chance to turn into screaming and stomping and slamming doors, even if that chance is smaller now.

I dont get these kids that just want to talk all the time with nothing important to say. Complete lack of understanding that every day isn't just about them. I am myself, for myself, and I keep that to myself. My friends get to see it, my family gets to see it, but I don't assume every person in every room wants to listen to me ramble about myself to the open air. I know they want attention, maybe they don't get enough from friends or family, but unless they want more negative attention they are going about it wrong. To be clear, I am a kid, too. I used to act just like them before I realized not broadcasting every bit of yourself to everyone you meet isn't "being yourself." It's an insecure version, always desperate for more validation. Never satisfied whether they get it or not.

i just feel so unwanted. i’m so sick of being no one’s first choice and no one truly loving me. my whole family loves my brother and my friends all have their own person. it really sucks having to live knowing that no one would choose you.

im 15 and single so idk why im saying this. But if there are any mothers who may change my opinion because I have brown desi parents who if I say “I want no children” will question me deeply when im older. because the PAIN OF BIRTH? WHATTT? IMMEDIATELY NO! Also the look of a pregnant belly? EUGH… the THOUGHT of having a child in you. EUGHH? WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE MILK IN MY BREASTS? AND I ENDURE PAIN FOR 9 MONTHS, THEN THE WORST PAIN OF MY LIFE BIRTHING A CHILD. AND THE MAN FEELS NOTHING? WHAT? Like why is my man standing there just helping while my back is breaking for a baby. (Also my mom did a c section, those are still painful bro). So mothers or people who have children (women. I don’t need a man changing my goddamn mind. Hush.). Help me! THANK YOU.

my stomachs churning I’m going to highschool ughh

if I am afraid my friend is in some type of situation where they will get groomed, should I tell an adult? Even though they told me to keep it a secret? I don't want them to hate me but I want to keep them safe. They've told me to keep things private a lot and I have but is this really the right thing? I just feel now might be the time to actually tell someone. I just really don't want them to hate me and say it wasn't my situation to tell but I don't want them getting hurt while I knew the whole time.

This is my first time trying to vent online. I just have felt so ugly for like half a year at this point and my friends are all so beautiful. They all tell me I am too but I know it’s bias that makes them say that. I’m just not an attractive person, neither for looks or personality. My best friend will glaze me with compliments if I ever send a photo but I just can’t believe what she says. To me, it feels like she’s pitying me even though I know she hates being pitied herself. It’s not like I want to kms but I still just want to almost hide everything about me and wear uncomfortable clothes to hide the features I hate like unlevel eyes and hips, no chest, acne scars, etc. I know I sound stupid when I complain about it and I feel bad for burdening my friends with self deprecating jokes. I just don’t know what else to do and I get too scared to look into surgeries for my future. I just wish I could’ve grown into the pretty girl everyone thought I’d be.

I feel upset, when I am not heard, when I can't voice my opinion without being frown upon. I feel like I can't express feelings without being shamed, I can't socialize to an extent without feel negative and lash out on people. I don't want to be like this at all, I want to be able to spend time with them but also have my own space.

hey so im like hella lonely and i lowks wanna pull some huzz well not lowks like highkey so basically, im a 14 yr old 160cm asian female living in vic aus any applicants must be: 14-15 cus age gaps are lowks weird taller than 150cm yea ik idc if ur short u should be loved too living in vic aus male so yea if ur interested and fit these categories reply to this post thx also im serious like im actually so lonely like i dont have friends... thx -f.g

i just cutted and i js - i promised so many people i wouldnt. i hate breaking promises but i keep hitting white b4 red and it hurtts and so many ppl tell me itl scar but idc. it hurts so it kinda numbs everything else, parents fighting and having to deal with being screamed at and left out. it just hurts so much. i dont wna be here anymre. ik i need help- i js dont wana bother ppl w MY problems and be a burden..

ok so im not kidding who tf is this bro: 'i am very glad i made you feel tuff lolol althoughh onto something a bit more serious Listen Everyone is proud to see you try, so try and fail, and you will learn to succeed. Things will be hard and things will not be easy But sooner or later, it'll all be a memory If you're scared of no one believing in you, then remember that I do. Make that one of your purposes. "I love you and I love your love. don't be deterred in due time, the love you give will fall back down on you, but for now or however long, enjoy your rest." <3' im sorry if its like a privacy breach to do this to whoever wrote this but u need to know that im so fucking grateful and ur a wonderful person and i hope ur pillow is cold on both sides forever and ever. im actually so intrigued as to who u actually r but like ik privacy and stuff but hope nothing bad happens to u❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️-f.g

No amount of prison time is punishment enough for the evil Donald Trump and his fellow demons. Elon Musk, Todd Blanche, Peter Thiel, Russ Vought, JD Vance, you name it. All of them must die. All of their assets must be frozen, liquidated, and given back to the people. And nothing but the Epstein files must ever carry their names or likenesses again. But not just them; their families, their “friends“, and every last cultist who worships them… No trace of Maga must be allowed to exist. we, the people, have endured their evil for over 160 years. Now, we have had enough. It’s time to rise up and do away with them once and for all.

I wish some would would acc respond back so I'm I know atleast see me

I get so jelous when my mum hugs my brother (whos younger then me) After me and him have a fight and then he ends up crying. A while ago I basically admitted I cut my self to my mum. She said we would talk about it. She forgot. No hugs, no kinds words, nothing. Just a "we will talk about it" and then nothing

i know i messed it up but i still think about her she was one of the only people i felt comfortable with and i could joke with her about anything and listen to her ramble for hours and i genuinely loved her but i was too scared to say anything bc what if she didnt like me back or thought it was weird bc im a girl and what if i ruined the friendship which is funny bc i ruined it anyway i would read the books she liked and play the games she talked about just so i could talk to her more and i hated seeing her care about someone else bc i wanted that to be me so instead of being normal i stopped talking to her to see if she would chase me and she did ask once but somehow that wasnt enough so i kept waiting until everything died and for months i told myself i moved on until i saw her again after months and bruh she looked so pretty and suddenly it all came back and i realized i wasnt over her i was just good at not seeing her and now i miss her and wish i held her hand once