I'm really confused with my life. am I worth it? or am I worthless? I can't help it but think about it times and times. and lately, I've been bored and not knowing what to do. and I never felt safe with my family, except for my sister and my cousins from my mothers family. I genuinely feel hollow, numb, and emotionless inside. I even do self harm... and lie to my online gc that I moved on from self harm and I'm clean for 6 days. I'm really confused with my life. sometimes I feel no interest in doing anything, and then the other sometimes, I would be caught on doing sum random shit. and overall, I'm still a minor. (below 14) I'm just a loser gen alpha. and when there is this event from scout on school, "perjusa". its, like, we have sleepover in school. and I didn't sleep, AT ALL. I just entertain my friends who are in the same room + who are not asleep yet. but thats when the time I started to not be myself. and the teachers who also stayed in the school scolded EVERY STUDENT there. ihm