All Rants

Live and let live they say, especially when you were the fuck that caused issues. Time's moved on and for the most part I'm not as vitrolic about how shit went down and how I acted... not saying it's all gone but it's somewhat shifted. However, all the gap has done is reminded me it's better to hate everyone and everything because as the assholes of the world say, no-one is coming to save you. What they really mean is no-one cares about you, I wish people just spoke the truth. That being said, fuck you still. Fuck you for making me feel something, destroy it and reduce me to less than nothing. Maybe tomorrow, something good will happen, right? No. Anyway, bye. I'm probably going to be bitched at for venting at all, so go ahead, laugh and bitch at me. I already know I'm just everyone's joke. Here's the only worthwhile, live, just to say fuck you all. You haven't killed me yet.

People really don't seem to know what a stressful job can do to your body, even after you've left. There's a reason I got a lot smaller when my job got really stressful and I got to my smallest size 2 months after I left. It can take a while to recover, especially when you know you'll have to find another job soon and it'll likely be the same all over again. You try having an appetite when you're feeling sick with anxiety and getting anxiety gas and diarrhoea and you have to do all you can to make sure you don't get so gassy you stink out the office. Or worse, shit yourself. I'm glad I'm not famous. Imagine having to explain to millions of people that you had to be careful what you ate because you couldn't stop farting and shitting at work. The only reason I gained the weight back was because we went into lockdown and I could fart in my room as much as I'd liked so food was no longer an issue.

1 message in inbox. "Hey, I think your cute even if youre weird. If you want we can hang out, maybe see if we can make things work?" Oh wait, nope... In reality that never fucking happens for me. May as well speedrun aging so I can die faster.

I never thought I'd be a denier of science, but Mac is right. We just put our faith in science, most of us haven't seen the evidence for it. I am seeing a lot of evidence against it. According to science I am unhealthy and would have a weakened immune system, yet I haven't had even a mild cold in 2 years while everyone else around me has. And according to science I was dying at the end of 2019 and start of 2020, so why was I absolutely fine? Something isn't adding up. Tbf a lot of science in 2020 didn't add up. Or maybe I'm just invincible. Is that why the Internet expects me to single-handedly take down powerful elites in a country I've never even visited?

i don’t understand why life treats me this like yes im on a date he says he wants me for real after the date hes dry and he’s talking to other girls this has happened too many times i’m going to be fucking alone forever as a girl and its so not fair. nothing is fair and I just want to go away forever because I feel like im just cursed forever. ill never be pretty or amount to whatever the other girls do. im so tirrd

It's three in the morning. I can't help but feel disgusted at myself for staying up so late, consuming so much media it would make anyone in their right mind go nuts, but I'm addicted. Everytime the screen turns off, my mind turns on. It started with intense nostalgia, living in a place that I loved. I wanted to go back. I miss it, but it was better that we moved. But then it turned into someone that kind of scarred me. I don't really understand trauma, but everytime it comes up, I can't help but tear up. Even if it's in the middle of a conversation that has nothing to do with it. It doesn't come up too frequently, but everytime I think of what happened, I'm back in my old apartment feeling totally helpless. I'm back in the car, trying to stop sobbing my eyes out so I don't escalate his feelings. He's gone, but I can still feel the tension his anger brought. I'm so terrified of people getting angry now. I try to joke, so maybe they're happier. So maybe they don't lash out. Stay safe<3

I want to kill myself everytime someone disagrees with me.

Sometimes I feel like we’re trapped in a game made by rich people. Except we don’t realize we’re playing by their rules and their terms and conditions. They make us think that we are somewhat in control but we are powerless. Look around, we don’t own anything anymore yet they made us so dependent on them. Subscriptions, entertainment, electricity, food and everything else. It’s getting fucking scary. And now surveillance pricing?? Like holy shit. How is this becoming legal?? And how do we beat this game?

guys I never forgot he was left handed and now I miss him frick

What on earth do people online expect me to do about the Epstein files? You think one kid-sized adult with social anxiety is going to be able to take down everyone involved? Get real

I was honestly saying some stupid shit when I was younger and saying now still prolly is stupid but my dad’s a gang leader. Idk I just wanted to say that

pet peeve of the century: rich white dudes on youtube making videos of their lavish lifestyle claiming to be self made entrepreneurs even though they were born into a rich family.

honestly looking back teachers definitely hated my ass. like none of teachers liked me I could tell from freaking kindergarten. upstate ny rlly racist, like it’s crazy but I’m closer to the city so there’s a lot of other poc kids that experience it

rumination and holding onto grudges is killing me. ive say ive gotten over a fair few, one of mine presumably moved away. most of my grudges are not the most…. mature people, so i’ve been trying to treat it with the same maturity they give me. as in, if they think it’s stupid and doesn’t matter, then it should be stupid and not matter to me. and the thing is i don’t really hate them. i care a little too much. i often fantasize about what i could’ve done to make it better. or have a little savior complex moment here and there. but it’s not like these situations are gravely serious. it’s always an offhand comment, i mean i wouldn’t mind if i never saw them again. but i do. and i wouldn’t lie if i said it doesn’t make me anxious. ive gotten deadass beaten by people in the past for literally no reason so i think thats partly why

People getting called out for bodyshaming being like "I'm not talking about naturally skinny people, I'm talking about people who's bones you can see" YES STOP BODYSHAMING THEM TOO! When you bodyshame one person like that, you bodyshame everyone with that feature. Including sick people, people with fast metabolisms, people struggling with mental health and/or addiction, people with digestive conditions, people who can't afford to eat 3 meals a day, etc.

need some tips on how to somehow numb down the pain on my molar tooth. uhhh everything is costing money and i don't wanna bring this up to my family since we're paying for a whole lot of other things. i still got my college stuff, apartment, groceries, and other family member's health issue. idk like i can manage with my eyes (though i kinda rlly need glasses too) but my tooth is aching harddd...been tryin to numb it down with water but it js goes back..wish stuff weren't so expensive

Me and my bf have this otter plushie I got a few months back and his name is merci. Whenever I feel sad or alone or upset or mad I grab it and cuddle it. It reminds me so much of him. It brings my comfort, even though we are long distance I feel like this is the closest thing to him.

I feel like trisha paytas on her kitchen floor era.

My roommate is a dick who freaks out about taking responsibility for things, tries to throw it on other people, then insults the people that were actually involved in making a difference. He shames people for having normal food preferences whereas he's an incredibly picky eater. He gets super defensive when pressed, and doesn't know how to problem solve so he gives up early about perfectly resolvable things. Basically he's a manchild that doesn't have empathy or knows how to collaborate with other people. I'd rather never have to associate with him again. His presence is actually repulsive to me and I can't wait to move out.

everybody gotta go i can’t even lie anymore