i hate this world so much. when i was openly radqueer i was so much happier and stress-free. for those who don't know radqueer just means radical queer, accepting of literally everyone. because i actually try to love and support people who are misunderstood like me. but i decided i want to try and make a career online, so i deleted all of my rq accounts, messages, no traces left. and i'm so fucking miserable. i literally want to die. those spaces were SO kind, so loving, so positive, actually offering help and advice, no trolling or ragebaiting or being mean to others (at least the spaces i was in).. now i'm in normie spaces and i hate it. everyone is so rude and cruel, making fun of others and mocking people openly, i don't understand? how do people live like this? i want to go back but i don't want to jeopardize my safety and possible career.. fuck my life dude. i hope i die soon.
Recent Rants
Why is making friends so hard. I mean I'm finally trying to talk to people and I'm doing pretty good but I just can't ever get that comfort with people that I used to get back in elementary and middle school. I wish I could live a fun-filled highschool life with parties, deep late-night talks, lifelong friendships and love. What scares me more is that what if college turns out exactly the same. Thousands of what-ifs worry me everyday. Like what if I end up all alone cuz of my incapability of forming human connections. Or what if I never find someone to love. Or what if I never find a bestfriend. Man I don't even know how it feels to have a bestfriend whom I can be very open with, who would know what's going on in my life, who I would be afraid to lose. I have come to this point where I'm not even afraid of losing people cuz of how many people I have already lost.
Oh ya adding to the same topic my sister thinks they are coming for an engagement! She is so resentful towards me like as if I wanted THIS! HIW IS THIS MY FAULT!! She's scared that she won't get married and only I will...she doesn't even want to stand with me...how I'm getting forced to say yes..it hurts when she does like that since she is my elder sister after all.. trears are forming in my eyes while I write this... oh ya and get this my dad wants to marry me and my sister together! We have a FREAKING 4 YRS AGE GAP. I nor my sister want to do the marriage together... now my sister is planning to go to another city than be there when the dude and his family come...I told her I wanted her to be there since I needed my sister and couldn't do it .... really what a broken family we are.. I loose the will to live all the time because of this, I loose any ambitious I get when I start thinking so most of the time I just don't think....it doesn't feel great though
My dad is trying to marry me off... I don't wanna marry right now but he won't listen I don't have a say in this matter, on top of that I have an elder sister how is yet to marry and the guy she rejected I have to accept it...cause he's a nice guy, we won't find a guy like him blah blah blah...My mother is busy consoling my sister,My sister is definitely not happy with this and screaming..... does everyone think I want the marriage.??? I'm not even happy about this I'm just 22 yrs old. My dad just won't listen , the minute we start saying anything he curses out, blames are home and if I push it he will even beat and slap me.... I never told I wanted to be born if he saw us as such a burden why even give birth to us...My resentment is high but who am I even supposed to direct on...I feel like crying....stupid so so sooo stupid....
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Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
To the creators of RantRam. I liked when there was writing prompts on here. You should bring those bACK!..that is all..
Whatever I do or say, i usually say the wrong thing. They don't understand and I don't know what to do. I can't even get to the bottom of my feelings but they expect so highly of me. I'm not even the favorite one and i will never be.
I might go to my friend's house and we might get up and sexual but I'm really freaking scared because I haven't had anyone touch me before yo
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I’m a struggling music artist dealing with the religious control my family has on me and it’s sad because they don’t know I renounced my faith 5 years ago. But they don’t think like I do. I’m different. God took the good people away from me and it’s not fair. I’m someone who studies philosophy. A free thinker. I wanna write and send my music out there but it’s hard to get far without equipment or talent. And I’m in an endless loop of a life and now my parents want me to get a job, I’m trying to finish high school and it’s all slipping so fast. I took it for granted like all kids do, I wish I wasn’t so dumb. I have a girlfriend who loves me and she’s amazing. She keeps me going but she doesn’t know I’m breaking apart. My short stories got no where: and my music. And it’s a lot. It’s life
It’s upsetting that they left me. They left me for good. I feel like I’ve lost everything even though I’ve still got good people on my side. It’s so hard to let go because it was years of deep relationships within that group and I did it to myself. Now I only feel like I’m bringing down those who are still there for me. God I’m hopeless and I wish I wasn’t like myself. I feel like I’m at the edge of a cliff already, I’m not even scared of leaving anymore. But then again if I leave, I’d upset those that been with me through my rough days. Then I’d be selfish. I don’t know what to do anymore and I feel lost. I’ve lost it all.
My grandpa is dying he has cancer in his jaw and i feel so self aware and lost in the world i wish i can help him wish i would have had more time with him i just feel like i wasn't there when i was an adult or when i was a kid but he says other wise i feel so empty i don't know how else to express these emotions other then writing i am not sure what i will do when he passes away i think everyone will be in a state of sadness on top of it my moms going to spiral and drink her feelings away i just feel like in the middle of a really bad earthquake
There’s a man who comes into my job with his teen kids sometimes, he seems like a good dad. I started developing an obsession for him and i know it’s bc I have daddy issues. I was ringing him up today and i swear at one point he was undressing me with his eyes and it made me feel like i was on fire. I want to see him all the time and i want to know him more and i want him to tell me I’m oretty and do awful things to me
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Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
I want us to spend the rest of our lives together. I really hope you propose this year because I am so madly and deeply in love with you. The last 4 years have flown by since you came into my life, and the only regret I have since we got together is that we couldn't meet sooner. We've looked at rings before, and found a few affordable options that we both would like, and now I'm just...ardently awaiting for that day, whenever it may come. I did say that I wanted it to be a surprise, but now I'm just waiting and simmering in my own anticipation. Im in love, with you, with us, and I dearly hope it stays that way forever. If the last 4 (almost 5) years are any indication, than I think that we'll be just fine.
Your birthday is coming up in a few days. I asked what your plans were, and you told me that you were going to hang out with your friend after work before going out to dinner with your family. And tbh, I could help but feel a pang of jealousy that you were going to hang out with another friend instead of me. From a logical standpoint it makes sense, you both have been friends for almost a decade so wanting to hang out with them on your birthday isn't a weird concept. In fact it's perfectly natural. While, we've only known each other a couple of months and only talk at work or online. I guess, I just really wish I could be a part of that inner circle ya know? I want to know you like she does, but that takes time. I just...click with you, and I'm trying to figure out if you clicked with me too? Idk, it's like one moment it feels like we're complete strangers, and the next, it's like we're chatting like we've been friends for ages. It's so confusing, and I just wish things were clearer...
May God guide me to become a better person. I'm sick of my life. I'm disgusted to myself. I don't know if I still deserve his love. I just want to end this and start a new one..
Feeling the same?
Need to rant? Let it out. Anonymous.
my whole school friend group turned against me because of this girl who claimed she was my bff (she never was) who I cut off + a failed situationship (all of them in the same group along with me). I thought the drama was done. I didn't wanna fight with anyone anymore but out of nowhere my only friend in my classes told me that she didn't want to talk to me anymore because she felt uncomfortable since she's talked trash about me behind my back a bunch of times??? so now the whole group hates me except for the only other guy and the weirdo girl (she's a sweetheart but we're not really close). I thought we ended things ok with my situationship but apparently she hates me and is saying stuff about me WHICH SCARES ME because we trusted each other so much so she has a LOT of embarrassing stuff about me that I wouldn't have told anyone else. Basically I went from having like 15 friends to only a couple and I also have to coexist with this group everydar for another year I'm so stressed
Me and my fiancée broke up, and i wish i never let my walls down, all he did was break my heart
IM SO SCARED- I was checking my spotify and saw an update so i checked and turns out it’s my exs profile. out of curiosity i check her profile and see some playlists, im there it says SHES MOVING TO WHERE I MOVED (freaking moving countries.) and she’s going crazy at the idea of seeing me again. we’ve been over for three years at least, and im so scared because my life is going okay so far but she always found a way to stress me. plus, she caused me several anxiety episodes and several psychology visits because she always came to me whenever she felt like not living anymore, thing that happened often. and introduced me to negative ways of coping, im scared of seeing her ever again. she will ruin my friendships, everything.