It feels like I just wasted all the efforts younger-me has put in to make future-me successful. In high school, I was dedicated and worked extremely hard. I got the grades, I had good extracurriculars, I was hopeful for my future. I really wanted to be a doctor. In my senior year I completely crumble. I am now in my first year of university, I have no ambition, no hope. All the hard work in high school that I thought would build myself and make it easier for me in university? Down the drain. While everyone around me knows exactly what they need to do to get into med school, and are actually doing what they need to do, I am stuck and have wasted over 20k in my first year of university. I wish I could be a smart girl again. I wish I could be a doctor too.