Today i woke up feeling the weight of my world on my shoulders like atlas but the weight of my world seems to be crushing me. Like im slowly disappearing into nothingness i feel every day i just exists not even really living any more just kind of on auto-pilot, trying my best not to crash out from the overwhelming feeling of uselessness. I try to keep things together for the only people who matter to me now they look up to me thinking im some kind of hero, but they don't understand the mental struggles i am dealing with since the divorce. My life has been in a downwards spiral, like a destructive endless hurricane continuously keeping me in a choke hold but not killing me just holding its grip around my throat enough to function for my day to day. It then will leave for a few months allowing things too start to get better and without warning it swoops back in taking away any and all progress I have made to getting back on track and I feel defeated but know i must push on for them.