I skip out on P.E usually cause I’m scared people will judge me and I mostly skip out when teams play against other (big teams, and it’s people you don’t know) I’m just not confident enough and am trying to work on it, but I feel like I will skip out on it forever and then get horrible grades that lead to a horrible future.

My mind is so noisy. I just want to sleep, but I still have so much to do. It’s exhausting. I’m really just being dramatic. I act like I’m special. The world doesn’t revolve around me. I thought I was the smartest just because I had achievements, but there are people who are smarter than me. Before, when I heard someone say that so-and-so is smart, I would think, “Really? I’m probably smarter than them.” I’m such an arrogant person. What my dad said was true—that my head would get too big because of the exam scores I got, since I was usually the highest.

I don’t want to go into the real world yet. . I haven’t even started, but I’m already tired—what more if I actually begin? I’m so tired. The real world is scary. I’m not ready for responsibilities. I’m weak. How am I supposed to survive out there? I just want to stay here in my room. I feel like studying is pointless—maybe I don’t even have a future. Maybe I’m just hardworking, not smart. I don’t have a single talent. I have many hobbies but I haven’t mastered any of them. When I learn the basics, I stop and don’t continue improving. Maybe I really don’t have a future. I’m just a burden to my family. I keep spending money but I don’t even help with household chores. I’m such a selfish person. I always put myself first. I don’t even care about my mom and siblings. I’m so worthless. I’m such a bad and hypocritical person,I judge people in my mind based on their appearance, even though I’m afraid of being judged myself. I don’t even have my own personality, I just copied it