I felt helpless for a moment, like the little kid me. I’m a teen, and 3 years ago I had a bad illness like the flu and something else? I felt like I was dying everyday. My fingers and lips would turn purple and if I got up I would faint. I was a motionless, doll like thing - but even then, my dad still expected me to go to school, do chores and etc. My dad would bully me, and at that time I would cut myself and he would mock me infront of his friends. I had also just had my opa die, and was groomed. My groomer would tell me to kill myself everyday, and on the night my best friend killed herself, my groomer left me. I felt so damn hopeless. I thought I’ve gotten better, but recently my father has been rude again, my iron is low to the point of me being like that old me, unable to stand without falling to my knees, and my partner of 2 years who gave me all the hope in the world, left me for a guy despite her saying she was lesbian. I’m sat on the toilet, feeling just like that old me.