I really hate myself. My dad always talks about how I use to be such a kind friendly person but now I’m just quiet and cold, and I really wish I weren’t like this. I was groomed when I was 7, my friend and me meet this 22 year old and everyday for 2 years we hung out and ended up in a weird poly but they both would just bully me. I know it wasn’t my friends fault, but her and my groomer would just tell me and my friends to kill myself then my friend did. At that point in my life I had people near me, people I was close to but never close enough to cry to. So, then after that friend died and those people closet to me kept repeating those words then left me the night after she died, I just couldn’t feel anything. It’s been 6 years and i still haven’t been able to feel a thing at all, all I do is sit and am silent. I can’t really feel sad, inlove or happy…I’m just blank? My mind tells me I should be feeling something, like a quiet beep but I just can’t respond or understand it. I hate it.