I find a lot of comfort in fictional characters and online spaces to the point its becoming unhealthy. I spend so much of my time day dreaming or consuming media of my favourite characters that its making me eat less because i dont want to leave my room. if im not thinking of said media or character, i get bad thoughts that sometimes lead me to harming myself or worse, i am constantly looking at the same characters over and over just so i dont do something horrible to myself. i know how stupid it is to rely so much on a character that isnt real, but i sometimes feel that theyre the only ones who could understand me and my struggles. I keep seeking out bad communities online even if i know its wrong, i purposefully seek out older people online just so i can feel loved or desired, it makes me feel so dirty afterwards but it feels good while im doing it. I keep finding myself interacting with bad online spaces because a lot of them are mentally ill teens like me and it brings me comfort