idk what to do. my friends are all horrible. like my closest “friend” says the n word and is just like ??? my second closest friend i cant fucking trust to write a sentence on a simple slide and i cant just leave them bc im horrible at making friends and being friends with people. if i left them id be left out in the open to die and idk if im a horrible person but i dont know whether to hate them or thank them. theyre terrible but theyre genuinely all i have to hang on to so i dont get bullied or ridiculed or lost in the middle of the hallway when i walk to class. i want to have a big group of friends that arent horrible and are actually funny. i really hope they dont go to the same highschool im going to next school year. i really just wanna leave everyone so im just the random fucking girl and i sit with people i barely know and fall asleep in the middle of class. i just wanna be pretty and sad alone where no one asks me if i want a hit of their vape in 2nd period. i wanna kms atp