I'm the sole provider of my house hold. I'm barely ambitious due to mental health issues that i take medication for. Every time i try to do something new like read a book, play a new video game or dedicate time to a project, i'll immediately get bored and stop. I have two nearly autistic step children that i never asked for who are constantly causing problems for me and because of my lack of desire, i don't like my children and wish that i could just run away. I love my girl but she lacks any desire to better herself and im tired of trying to show her the positives in it. She just wants to be a stay at home mom but then does nothing in the way to spend time with her children. I also had a brother/best friend who used me and now i have no friends. I'm stuck in a place that I hate and can't find a way out. Were also one check away from absolute poverty and i know that if i was by myself, i'd be much better off but I stay. I stay because i love her and i love our baby... I need a break.