sometimes tbh i just want to end everything not like i want to kill myself maybe i do but to end the suffering my parents when i need them the most behave like i don't exist it hurts i am just a teen who just wants a happy family but i guess i am not that lucky enough i just hate my sister iever since i was a kid she abused me beat me just because i was a girl and she wanted a brother y mom had a miscarrige after me i was very young i don't even remember when did this happend my sister abused me beat me and told me ahe wish i was dead instead of my brother ughhhh i don't know what to do anymore because there's so much to say but still can't express it i need therepy seriously but my parents don't take mental health seriously i do't know what to dooooo

what if i just end it all? would it really be that bad? I keep praying. im doing everything i can. has God given up on me? everyone else has. Im barely even functioning. my depressions sky high. Fuck man. i feel so empty. i feel so alone. so dead inside. i just want it to stop. why wont it stop. why do i relive what he did every fucking day. ive lost all hope. im tired. i just want to die. every. moment. of. everyday. i feel his hands like their still there. i miss my friends. i miss my family. but most of all i miss the girl i used to be. i actually watched him in the mirror above the hotel bed rip the spark out of my eyes. my mom made my kid brother (13 btw) search for my razors while i was bakeracted.

The concept of religion absolutely pisses me off, i hate videos using religion for likes and subscribers, (im an atheist by the way.)| The videos that are like "oowww Like and subscwibe if you love allah" or whatever fucked up bullshit, "god loves you" "you are a son/daughter of god" Look on my face right now and try and see if I GIVE A FUCK!!! and plus, most of the images are ai slop being used to decieve kids so they can just press a thumbs up button, (really fucking lazy, I know.) like im sorry, "jesus" Did NOT, NOT!!! bless a random motherfuckers food, Just a quick note I AM NOT hating on religion, im just saying it can be annoying at times, anyways, continuing, i hate how much my school forces christianity Right in my face, i dont WANT to pray to a god i dont believe in, and i dont have to believe in it, OK?!?! Anyways.... That was a long ride!! Thanks for reading, wish me luck i guess, buh bye