Today I fucked up on the bus. I asked for a ticket, the guy said it wasn't working. Like the neurodivergent person I am, who TOTALLY hadn't been rehearsing asking for a ticket for a while beforehand, I completely ignored what he said and just asked for a ticket again in exactly the same way. It literally went in one ear and out the other. Bro looked at me and said that it's not working again. I said "Oh." And then I walked and sat down, resisting the urge to put my head in my hands. It was SO embarrassing! This is a new bus over started taking a few months ago, and maybe the guy recognises me! Now, whenever he sees me, I bet he'll think about how weird I am. Ugh, I hate myself! Maybe I'll catch a different bus, just to avoid him. But at least I felt an emotion today, which hasn't happened in a while. I feel like a zombie, I feel the heaviness in my limbs, and my field of view feels like a dolly zoom. Anyways, have a nice day gals & pals!