tiesha (con't): It was ultimately the wrong timing, wrong words, and wrong feelings. But I don’t care that any of it was wrong. This is the only way I feel right being who I am. Are you disgusted with me? Are you angry? Are you surprised? Are you annoyed? If I had to guess, you are overwhelmed and I’m not helping with that. Better that than the chance that you feel nothing for me. Well, I am ashamed. And I am sorry. So does that count for anything even though it’s been so damn long? Too long. It’s painful for me to withstand long periods of time without you. And the fact is I’ve lied to many people, not just you. And yet I’ve also told you things that only you and I know. I like to think that feeling this resigned, because of my amount of grief and sorrow, is my way of repenting for being a bad person just because bad things happened to me. But it doesn’t fix anything. And I never expected you to fix me. I never wanted you to.