I feel so jealous of other parents. They're so nice and caring especially when it comes to their sexuality and gender expression and yet I'm stuck in a conservatives hellscape because of some fucking idiotic prejudices they hold. They know who I am and still refuse to accept it because I'm not the right child. Fuck sake I wasn't even wanted when I was a child, I was a mistake they made that clear right away. My mom never wanted me and only now wants me as long as I am the splitting image of who they want to be. I'm an investment, not a person but an investment for her to cashout and live out her dreams. I tell her that I'm not and once again I'm the unwanted child. My dad is no better. They both enacted such violent abuse but my dad was always the one mostly doing it because he was stronger and larger and able to truly hurt me. He fucking enjoyed it. I can't help but get so jealous of others and beg for parents like theirs.