i've tried countless times to socialize but i can't seem to ever do it right. i've watched and been with out-going people, the ones that you talk to for 10 seconds and already feel comfortable with, but when i try and be like them the result's never the same. i know i shouldn't try and be someone that i'm not but if i stayed myself no one would have approached me. so i'd be myself, sure, but alone. i can not describe how loneliness terrifies and hurts me, well it's more like it terrifies me how something so simple can hurt so bad. i keep telling myself i don't need anyone but that's just a big and ugly lie. i feel so unworthy of anyone's care or attention. anyway, i'm drifting from the starter point, what i was trying to say is that it seemed unfair to me how some people socialize like it's nothing, because it's not. for me at least.