ive been spiraling ever since my dad talked to me about philosophical stuff and it puts my brain in a state of limbo of some sort where it constantly tries to understand something it cannot comprehend at all and it's really fucking me up. I wish i was stupid so i wouldn't care or understand. so many people live obliviously and clearly they seem happier with their lives. It doesn't matter, I'll forever exist one way or another in the confines of this universe but does existence even exist? even if i die it wont matter. its not bad or good. everything is neutral. good and bad doesn't truly exist does it? i want to kill myself already. maybe i'll be dead in two days or maybe this week, this month, this year. who knows. i don't know.
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