The hollow feeling in my hearts gone now, not as in its been filled but more as in im living with it. I need a distraction 24/7, I had summer school, it kept me away from my thoughts. But anytime there's more than a day off, it creeps back.. my stomach hurts. Not as in im hungry, or a stomach bug. It aches for something more than whats in front of me. It turns to the left when I look at my repetitive hair, it turns to the right when I look at my unideal face thats never touched a day of makeup. It churns whenever I see my grades go down, the whole future I have planned out crashing to the ground. What if I can't do it, what if rhe universe doesnt let me do it, what if im not smart enough to do it, what if i can't do anything else after it? It scares me, having to think about everything alone. what is it that I haven't healed from that hurts the hollowness in my heart, making it deeper and bigger every second, what is it that makes my stomach rumble and churn with evrry moving step.