. In 2021 my brother had a life altering stroke at 13 years old, he was just a baby. I was 9 and my sister was 6. After the stroke he lost all ability to use his right side of his body, and can’t walk or talk or use his right hand and it kills me to watch him everyday. He’s 19 now, he can’t read, graduate Highschool, get a job, or be my big brother anymore. I have to babysit him and take care of his needs. The part of his brain that helps him rationalize and control his emotions was greatly affected too, he now has bpd and abuses tf out of my whole entire family. I sometimes wish he died in that bed, or in the ambulance, or the icu. At least he wouldn’t have to feel like this, at least we wouldn’t have to feel like this. I don’t want to selfish but it hurts me so much. He put his hands on me recently and it scared the shit out of me. Everything keeps me awake at night 😢 I wish that it could be normal for everyone again but it can’t. I want to kill myself