Rant #12546

Been feeling suicidal most of my life Im too chicken shit to kms Slowly every day i try to kms by smoking doing heroine popping pills wishing n hoping i get cancer so I can get the euthanasia i think about breaking into a chemist n stealing all their narcotics n oding there n then or calling 911 and telling them i have a hostage n then wen they come i will pretend like I have a gun and thell empty their guns into me