not condoning this behavior for others, do not hurt urself like me, I realized back to back within a month: -I couldnt consent to the things 1 "friend" texted me and did with me online because I was high and drunk and I told him over and over again -I couldnt have consented to the "friend" who asked to touch my butt once and then didnt stop touching me and molested me cuz I was high and drunk -My first partner groomed and assaulted me and I never could have consented even if I wanted it bc he coerced me to be sexual with him the first times and I was trauma bonded -Experienced incest from my mom when she French kissed me at 7 instead of saying no. And forced her to fue in me when I was 19 -Probably raped by my dad based on the things I do remember Its doing a number on me and I cant stop letting guys online use me and my trauma to get off, when sober. I know it makes my friends sad to know this but I cant stop. Its like an addiction. I dont even get off half the time I do it. :"/