everything is so fucking overwhelming right now. i know i should write this in my onenote journal instead of on here but i feel like i want to vent to someone and maybe someone will see it even though it won't effect me at all. i feel very isolated right now and i want to talk to a human so i went to supportiv but the person i was talking to added some other random person to the chat who wanted to talk so i left because i felt SO uncomfortable it was just terrible. i feel like i don't care about anything anymore i feel like i'm really apathetic and i think WAY too much and have so many thoughts in my head all the time going in circles and if i cared about things then half of those thoughts should deeply concern me and i think i'd also want to end everything if i actually cared. i feel very lost and isolated right now and my parents don't get it and i want to talk to an actual professional or something but can't especially cause of my parents will want to be in the room or something.