I’m depressed. I never wanted to admit it but I am. I was happy I graduated and I got engaged and now I can’t find a job. Yet along side it all I am struggling to understand if I am happy. If I want this engagement, I mean hell I am only 23 and yes I love him but he told me if I ever left he would kill. The thing is I don’t like his family, they try but it’s so much drama I mean hell someone jsut hung themselves the other day. I want to move, I want to move back to the UK but I can’t, they don’t like it. I feel more lost than ever. I sometimes wish it was over but at the same time I want life and I want to explore.