I have absolutely nobody to talk to at all, I’m struggling with anorexia and I’m just so tired of my day by day life. I wake up and follow a meal plan that is force fed to me because i have no more say in what I can eat anymore. My freedom stripped from me all at once with my choices when it comes to food not being MY choices. I feel like a guest in my own home, I feel like instead of gaining the independence I should get as I grow older I am losing it little by little, I feel like I can hardly even feel anything anymore. Doctors, friends who don’t know much, family, all congratulating me for eating food I did not pick, for eating the food I have to force down my throat, for just eating in general as if I am some sickly animal. Being watched constantly because I am no longer trusted alone and hating it. Hating my body. Hating myself. I am so sick of the tiring cycle I have to push through daily, I am so sick of being anorexic but not skinny, I am so sick of being sick.