My dream is to help people, but to help people is to help myself. It's frustrating but I know it's a slow path. I'm acknowledging that I'm struggling, I don't know what to do. I know I don't have skill to walk my dream yet. But, if not I just can't believe I will have to work until my bones get weak. It's definitely not a problem but to where my goal is. To continue to please a boss is a NO. I don't want to worry about boss sending random messages and I got worry I'm not replying. I promise it's not so important that people can stare at you weirdly asking why I'm not responding on the chat group when I come to work tomorrow. I don't want to respond. I really can cry heavily if I can't than worry about spouse. It's a dream I can't forget. My eyes get teary. What is life without a purpose?