I want to kill myself. i dont know why. I have a decent life. but the desire to die just wont go away and i dont know what to do or how to cope. but im also too scared to actually do it. i dont have close friends to ask for help. when a doctor told my mom that i propably have depression she didnt do anything about it or even talk with me about it after. she hasnt noticed how bad it is, or notice it at all. now im scared that ill work up the courage to tell her and she wont care or do anything about it. i dont know how much longer I can keep crying myself to sleep, isolating myself from everyone, and wanting to die yet being too scared to actually end it. I feel like a terrible person because why am i wanting to die when i have a priveliged life i feel so selfish and i feel like im being overdramatic about it in my head and i dont know what to think or do. i hate looking into my future graduation and life ahead and feeling like nothing will ever be worth living for